





Glass 

to t fTf& 

Copyright hi 0 



COPYRIGHT DEPOSIT. 




















V 
















THE WONDERFUL BED 





































. 










* 














































m 


3 


s 


ait 


S|| 

’ ■> 

1 

i>* 

& 


m 

a . 

> <• 

1 






THE 

WONDERFUL BED 



WITH ILLUSTRATIONS BY 

EMILY HALL CHAMBERLIN 



INDIANAPOLIS 

THE BOBBS-MERRILL COMPANY 

PUBLISHERS 


Copyright 1912 
The Bobbs-Merrill Company 





press or 

BRAUNWORTH & CO. 
BOOKBINDERS AND PRINTERS 
BROOKLYN, N. Y. 


4 /. ^ 

t Ul.Aoi y 7 74 

?<- t> f 



CONTENTS 


CHAPTER 

I Aunt Jane’s Old Toys 






page 

1 

II 

The Angry Warming-Pan 






19 

III 

A Visit to the Goose . 






23 

IV 

The False Hare . 






49 

V 

Real Live Pirates 






60 

VI 

Aboard the Merry Mouser 






74 

VII 

Catnip Island 






87 

VIII 

Mutiny on Board 






103 

IX 

Captain Jinks 






114 

X 

Meeting a Queen 






122 

XI 

The Good Dreams 






145 

XII 

Enter the Knight-Marb 






165 

XIII 

The Bad Dreams 






183 

XIV 

In the Hollow Tree . 






200 

XV 

Commander-in-Chief . 

.•} 

W 

:•] 

M 


213 



THE WONDERFUL BED 



’ V 


i 









THE WONDERFUL BED 


CHAPTER I 
AUNT JANE'S OLD TOYS 

It WAS beginning to get dark in the big 
nursery. Outside the wind howled and the 
rain beat steadily against the window-pane. 
Rudolf and Ann sat as close to the fire as they 
could get, waiting for Betsy to bring the lamp. 
Peter had built himself a comfortable den be- 
neath the table and was having a quiet game of 
Bears with Mittens, the cat, for his cub — quiet, 
that is, except for an angry mew now and then 
from Mittens, who had not enjoyed an easy 
moment since the arrival of the three children 
that morning. 

“Rudolf,” Ann was saying, as she looked 


i 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


uneasily over her shoulder, “I almost wish we 
hadn’t come to stay at Aunt Jane’s alone with- 
out mother. I don’t believe I like this room, 
it’s so big and creepy. I don’t want to go to 
bed. Especially” — she added, turning about 
and pointing into the shadows behind her — 
“especially I don’t want to go to bed in that!” 

The big bed in Aunt Jane’s old nursery was 
the biggest and queerest the children had ever 
seen. It was the very opposite of the little 
white enameled beds they were used to sleep- 
ing in at their apartment in New York, being a 
great old-fashioned four-poster with a canopy 
almost touching the ceiling. It was hung with 
faded chintz, and instead of a mattress it had 
a billowy feather bed over which were tucked 
grandmother’s hand-spun sheets and blankets 
covered by the gayest of quilts in an elaborate 
pattern of sprigged and spotted calico patches. 
The two front posts of the bed were of dark 


2 


AUNT JANE’S OLD TOYS 


shiny wood carved in a strange design of 
^ twisted leaves and branches, and to Ann, as she 
looked at them by the leaping flickering fire- 
light, it seemed as if from between these leaves 
and branches odd little faces peered and 
winked at her, vanished, and came again and 
yet again. 

“Bother!” exclaimed Rudolf so loud that his 
little sister started. “It’s just a bed, that’s all. 
It’ll be jolly fun getting into it. I believe I’ll 
ask if I can’t sleep there, too, instead of in the 
cot. I wanted to take a running jump at it 
when we first came this morning, but Aunt 
Jane wouldn’t let me with my boots on. She 
said she made that quilt herself, when she was 
a little girl. We’ll all climb in together to- 
night as soon as Betsy goes, and have a game 
of something — I dare say we’ll feel just like 
raisins in a pudding!” 

“All the same,” said Ann, “I don’t think I 


3 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

like it, Rudolf. I wish Betsy would bring the 
lamp!” 

It was almost dark now, and they could not 
see, but only hear, Peter as he came shuffling 
out of his den, dragging his unhappy cub, and 
prowled around the darkest corners of the 
room. Being a bear, he was not at all afraid, 
but made himself very happy for a while with 
pouncing and growling, searching for honey, 
and eating imaginary travelers. Then the cub 
escaped, and Peter tired of his game. Rudolf 
and Ann heard him tugging at the door of an 
old-fashioned cupboard in a far corner of the 
room, and presently he came over to the fire, 
carrying a wooden box in his arms. 

“Oh, Peter, you naughty boy!” cried Ann. 
“You’ve been at the cupboard, and Aunt Jane 
said expressly we were not to take anything 
out of it!” 

“You are just like Bluebeard’s wife/’ began 


4 


AUNT JANE’S OLD TOYS 

Rudolf, but Peter — as was his way — paid no 
attention to either of them. He put the box 
down on the hearth-rug, and got on his hands 
and knees to open it. Then, of course, the 
other two thought they might as well see what 
there was to see, and all three heads bent over 
the box. After all it contained nothing very 
wonderful, the cover itself being the prettiest 
part, Ann thought, for on it was painted a 
bright-colored picture of a little girl in a 
funny, high-waisted, old-fashioned dress, mak- 
ing a curtsy to a little boy dressed like an old 
gentleman and carrying a toy ship in his hand. 
The box was filled with old toys, most of them 
chipped or broken. There was a very small 
tea-set with at least half of the cups missing, a 
wooden horse which only possessed three legs, 
and the remains of a regiment of battered tin 
soldiers. 

“How funny the box smells — and the toys, 

5 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


too!” Ann said. “Sort of queer and yet sweet, 
like mother’s glove case. I think she said it 
was sandal-wood. That set must have been a 
darling when it was new, but there’s only just 
a speck of blue left and the gilt is every bit 
gone. These must be Aunt Jane’s toys that she 
had when she was little.” 

“That was a long time ago,” remarked Ru- 
dolf thoughtfully. “I don’t see why Aunt J ane 
didn’t throw ’em away, they’re awful trash, I 
think. Those soldiers aren’t bad, but — ” 

Just then Ann’s sharp eyes caught Peter as 
he was about to slip away with a little parcel 
done up in silver paper that had lain all by 
itself at the very bottom of the box. By this 
time she and Rudolf had both forgotten that 
they had no more right than Peter to any of 
the things in the box, and both threw them- 
selves on their little brother-. Peter fought and 
kicked, but was at last forced to surrender the 
6 


AUNT JANE’S OLD TOYS 


little parcel. Under the silver paper which 
Rudolf hurriedly tore off, was layer after layer 
of pink tissue infolding something which the 
boy, when he came to it at last, tossed on the 
floor in his disgust. 

“Pshaw,” he exclaimed, “it’s nothing in the 
world but an old corn-cob!” 

“Yes, it is, too,” said Ann, picking it up. 
“It’s a doll, the funniest old doll I ever saw!” 

And a strange little doll she was, made out 
of nothing more or less than a withered corn- 
cob, her face — such a queer little face — 
painted on it, and her hair and dress made 
very cleverly out of the corn shucks. Ann 
burst out laughing as she looked at the old 
doll, and turning to her new children, Marie- 
Louise and Angelina-Elfrida, which her 
mother had given her for Christmas, she 
placed the two beauties on the hearth-rug, one 
on each side of the corn-cob, just to see the dif- 
7 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


ference. This seemed to make Peter very 
cross. He tried his best to snatch away the old 
doll, but Rudolf, to tease him, held him off 
with one hand while with the other he seized 
the poor creature by her long braids and 
swung her slowly over the fire. 

“Wouldn’t it be fun, Ann,” said he, “to see 
how quick she’d burn?” 

“Oh, you mustn’t, Rudolf,” Ann cried, 
“Aunt Jane mightn’t like it. I shouldn’t be 
surprised if she’d punish you.” 

At that Rudolf lowered the old doll almost 
into the blaze, and she would most certainly 
have burned up, she was so very dry and 
crackly, if at that very moment Aunt Jane had 
not come into the room and snatched her out 
of his hand. Rudolf never remembered to 
have seen Aunt Jane so vexed before. Her 
blue eyes flashed, and her cheeks were quite 
pink under her silver-colored hair. He ex- 
8 


AUNT JANE’S OLD TOYS 

pected she would scold, but she didn’t, she 
only said — “Oh, Rudolf!” in a rather unpleas- 
ant way, and then, after she had carefully re- 
stored the corn-cob doll to her wrappings, she 
knelt down and began to gather up the old 
toys which the children had scattered over the 
hearth-rug. Ann and Rudolf helped her, and 
Peter who, though a very mischievous little 
boy, was always honest, confessed that he had 
been the one to open the old cupboard and 
take out the box. He seemed to feel rather 
uncomfortable about it, and after the things 
had been put away, he climbed upon Aunt 
Jane’s lap and hid his head upon her shoulder. 

“Never mind, Peter, dear,” she said, hold- 
ing him very tight, “I always meant to show 
you my old toys some day. I dare say yoii 
children think it strange that I have kept such 
shabby things so long, but when I was a little 
girl I did not have such beautiful toys as you 


9 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


have now, and the few I had I loved very 
dearly/’ 

“Was this your nursery, Aunt Jane,” Ann 
asked. 

“Yes, dear. I slept all alone in the big bed, 
and I kept my toys always in the old cupboard. 
I spent many and many an hour curled up on 
that window-seat, playing with my doll. Yes, 
I did have others, Ann, but I think I loved the 
corn-cob doll best of all, perhaps because she 
was the least beautiful.” 

“Didn’t you have any little boys to play 
with?” Rudolf asked. “Other boys beside fa- 
ther and Uncle Jim, I mean.” 

“There was one little boy who came some- 
times,” Aunt Jane said. “He lived in the near- 
est house to ours, though that was a mile away. 
Those were his tin soldiers you saw in the box. 
He gave them to me to keep for him when he 
io 


AUNT JANE’S OLD TOYS 


went away to school, and thought himself too 
big to play at soldiers any more.” 

“And when he came back from school, did 
he used to come and see you?” 

“Yes, he used to come every summer till he 
got big.” 

“And what did the little boy do when he 
got big, Aunt Jane?” 

“When he got big,” said Aunt Jane slowly, 
looking very hard into the fire, “he went away 
to sea.” 

“O-ho!” cried Rudolf. “And when he 
came back what did he bring you?” 

“He never did come back,” said Aunt Jane, 
and she bent her head low over Peter’s so that 
the children should not see how shiny wet her 
eyes were. Ann and Rudolf did see, however, 
and politely forced back the dozen questions 
trembling on the tips of their tongues about 


ii 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


the different ways there were of being lost at 
sea. Rudolf in particular would have liked to 
know whether it was a hurricane or sharks or 
pirates or a nice desert island that had been 
the end of that little boy, and he was about to 
begin his questioning in a roundabout manner 
by asking whether sea serpents had often been 
known to swallow ships whole, when the door 
opened, and in came Betsy, Aunt Jane’s old 
servant. She had the lamp in one hand and the 
great brass warming-pan, with which she al- 
ways warmed the big bed, in the other. 

Her arrival disturbed the pleasant group 
by the nursery fire, and reminded Aunt 
Jane that it was the children’s bedtime. 
She kissed them good night, heard them 
say their prayers, and then went quickly 
away, leaving Betsy to help them un- 
dress. Now this was rather unwise of Aunt 
Jane, for Betsy and the children did not get 


.12 


AUNT JANE’S OLD TOYS 


on. She was one of those uncomfortable per- 
sons who refuse to understand how a little 
conversation makes undressing so much less 
unpleasant. She was not inclined to give Ru- 
dolf any information on the subject of sea ser- 
pents, nor would she listen to Ann’s remarks 
on how much more fashionable hot-water bot- 
tles were than warming-pans. She had even 
no sympathy for Peter when he wished to be 
considered a diver going down to the bottom 
of the sea after gold, instead of a little boy be- 
ing bathed in a tin tub. 

Betsy had a horrid way of scrubbing, being 
none too careful about soap in people’s eyes, 
and Peter came out dreadfully clean. Feeling 
that he needed comforting of some sort, he 
looked about for Mittens and discovered him 
at last, taking a much needed nap behind the 
sofa. Squeezing the weary cat carefully under 
one arm, Peter began to climb by the aid of a 
13 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


chair into the big bed. Betsy caught sight of 
him and guessed his plan. Poor little Peter’s 
hopes were dashed. 

“No you don’t, Master Peter,” she snapped 
at him. “Ye don’t take no cats to bed with ye 
—not in this house!” And she grabbed Mit- 
tens away very roughly, set him outside the 
door, and shut it with a bang. After she had 
tucked the bedclothes firmly about the little 
boy, she turned her attention to Rudolf and 
Ann, evidently thinking Peter was settled for 
the night — which shows just how much Betsy 
knew about him. Peter waited patiently till 
she was in the depths of an argument with Ru- 
dolf who was trying vainly to make her un- 
derstand that the dirt upon his face was merely 
the effect of his dark complexion. Then 
Peter slipped out of bed, darted out of the 
door, and returned in a moment or two with 
the unhappy Mittens once more a prisoner be- 
14 


AUNT JANE’S OLD TOYS 


neath his arm. This time he managed to con- 
ceal the cat from Betsy’s sharp eyes. 

At last all three children were in the big 
bed, Rudolf having refused to consider sleep- 
ing in the cot, and Betsy, after a gruff good 
night, departed, carrying the lamp with her. 
Now that the room was in darkness except 
for the flickering light of the dying fire, Ann’s 
fears began to come back to her. She sat up 
in bed and peered round her into the dark cor- 
ners. 

“I — I wish Betsy had left the light,” she 
said. “But it would have been no use asking 
her.” 

“Not a scrap,” said Rudolf. “Not that I 
mind the dark,” he added hastily, “I rather 
like it, only don’t let’s lie still and — and — lis- 
ten for things. Let’s play something.” 

“Shall we try who can keep their eyes shut 
longest,” suggested Ann. 

15 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“Oh, that’s a stupid game! Beside Peter 
would beat anyway, for he’s half asleep now. 
Shake him up, Ann.” 

When shaken up Peter refused to admit 
that he was even sleepy. He was very cross, 
and immediately began to accuse Rudolf of 
having taken his cat. This Rudolf — and also 
Ann — denied. They had seen Peter smuggle 
Mittens into bed the second time, but had sup- 
posed he must have escaped and followed 
Betsy out. 

“No, he didn’t neither,” Peter insisted. “I 
had him after she went. He was ’most tamed.” 

“Then,” said Ann, “he must be in the room 
and we might as well have him to play with. 
Rudolf, I dare you to get up and look for 
him!” 

And Rudolf got up — just to show he was 
not afraid. Before stepping into those dark 
shadows, however, he armed himself with his 
16 


AUNT JANE’S OLD TOYS 


tin sword, a weapon he was in the habit of tak- 
ing to bed with him in case of burglars, and 
with this he poked bravely under the bed and 
in all the dark corners, calling and coaxing 
Mittens to come forth. At last both he and 
Ann felt sure the cat could not be in the room. 

“He must have got out somehow,” said 
Rudolf. “Anyway, I sha’n’t bother any more 
looking for him.” Still grasping his sword, he 
climbed back into the big bed between his 
brother and sister. Peter was still cross and 
grumbly. He kept insisting that Mittens 
might have disappeared inside the bed — 
which was a piece of nonsense neither of the 
others would listen to. 

After some discussion Rudolf and Ann 
agreed that the very nicest thing to do would 
be to make a tent out of the bedclothes, 
and seeing Peter was again inclined to 
nod, they shook him awake and sternly 
17 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


insisted on his joining in the game. By 
tying the two upper corners of the covers to 
the posts at the head of the great bed a splen- 
did tent was quickly made, bigger than any 
the children had ever played in before, so big 
that Rudolf, who was to lead the procession 
into its white depths, began to feel just the least 
little bit afraid, — of what he hardly knew. 
How high the white walls rose! Not like a 
snuggly bed-tent, but like — like a real white- 
walled cave. Being a brave boy, he quickly 
put these unpleasant thoughts out of his mind, 
and grasping his sword, crawled on his hands 
and knees into the dark opening. Behind him 
came Ann, and behind Ann, Peter. 

“Are you ready?” asked Rudolf. “Then in 
we go!” 




CHAPTER II 


THE ANGRY WARMING-PAN 

IT WAS not surprising that the big bed 
should be different from any other bed the 
children had ever played in, yet it was cer- 
tainly taking them a long, long time to crawl 
to the foot! 

“It must have a foot,” thought the brave 
captain of the band, as he plunged farther and 
farther into the depths of the white cave. “All 
beds have.” Then he stopped suddenly as a 
loud squeal of mingled surprise and terror 
came from just behind him. 

“Oh, Rudolf,” Ann cried, “I don’t want to 
play this game any longer — let’s go back!” In 
the half-darkness Rudolf felt her turn round 
19 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


on Peter, who was close behind her. “Go back, 
Peter/’ she ordered. 

“I can’t,” came a little voice out of the 
gloom. 

“You must — oh, Peter, hurry!” 

“I can’t go back,” said Peter calmly, “be- 
cause there isn’t any back. Put your hand be- 
hind me and feel.” 

It was true. Just how or when it had hap- 
pened none of them could tell, but the soft 
drooping bedcovers had suddenly, mysteri- 
ously risen and spread into firm white walls 
behind and on either side, leaving only a 
narrow passageway open in front. It was 
nonsense to go on their hands and knees any 
longer, for even Rudolf, who was tallest,, 
could not touch the arched white roof when 
he stood up and stretched his arm above his 
head. He could not see Ann’s face clearly, but 
he could hear her beginning to sniff. 


20 


THE ANGRY WARMING-PAN 


“Now, Ann,” said he sternly, though in 
rather a weak voice, “don’t you know what this 
is? This is an adventure.” 

“I don’t care,” sniffed Ann, “I don’t want 
an adventure. I want to go back — back to 
Aunt Jane!” And the sniff developed into a 
flood of tears. 

“Peter is not crying, and he is only six.” 

This rebuke told on Ann, for she was almost 
eight. “But what are we go — going to do?” 
she asked, her sobs decreasing into sniffs again. 

“We’ll just have to go on, I suppose, and 
see what happens.” 

“Well, I think — I think Aunt Jane ought to 
be ashamed of herself to put us in such a big 
bed we could get lost in it!” 

“Maybe” — came the voice of Peter cheer- 
fully from behind them — “maybe she wanted 
to lose us, like bad people does kittens.” 

“Peter, don’t be silly,” ordered Rudolf 


21 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


sternly. “There isn’t really anything that can 
happen to us,” he went on, speaking slowly 
and thoughtfully, “because we all know that 
we really are in bed. We know we didn’t get 
out , so of course we must be in? 

This was good sense, yet somehow it was not 
so comforting as it ought to have been, not even 
to Rudolf himself who now began to be trou- 
bled by a disagreeable kind of lump in his 
throat. Luckily he remembered, in time to 
save himself from the disgrace of tears, how 
his father had once told him that whistling was 
an excellent remedy for boys who did not feel 
quite happy in their minds. He began to 
whistle now, a poor, weak, little whistle at first, 
but growing stronger as he began to feel more 
cheerful. Grasping his sword, he started 
ahead, calling to the others to follow him. 

The white passage was so narrow that the 
children had to walk along it one behind an- 
22 


V 


THE ANGRY WARMING-PAN 


other in Indian file. .The floor was no longer 
soft and yielding but firm and hard under their 
feet, and by stretching out their hands they 
could almost touch the smooth white walls on 
either side of them. At first the way was per- 
fectly straight ahead, but after they had 
walked what seemed to them a long, long 
time, the passage curved sharply and widened 
a little. The children noticed, much to their 
relief, that it was growing lighter around 
them. 

“Pm getting tired,” Ann announced at last. 
“See, Ruddy, there is a nice flat black rock. 
Let’s sit down and rest on it.” 

There was room for them all on the large 
flat rock, and when they were settled on it, 
Peter remarked: “I’m hungry!” Now this 
was a thing Peter was used to saying at all 
times and on all occasions, so it was just like 
him to bring it out now as cheerfully and con- 


23 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


fidently as if Betsy had been at his elbow with 
a plate of bread and butter. 

“Oh, dear,” Ann exclaimed, “what a long, 
long while it seems since we had our tea! I 
suppose it will soon be time to think about 
starving.” And she took her little handker- 
chief out of the pocket of her nighty and be- 
gan to wipe her eyes with it. 

“Not yet,” said Rudolf hastily. “I put some 
candy into my pajamas pocket when I went 
to bed, because the time I like to eat it best is 
just before breakfast — if people only wouldn’t 
row so about my doing it. Let me see — it was 
two chocolate mice I had — I hope they didn’t 
get squashed when we were playing! No, here 
they are.” The chocolate mice were a little 
the worse for wear, in fact there were white 
streaks on them where the chocolate had 
rubbed off on the inside of Rudolf’s pocket, 
but the children didn’t mind that. They 


24 


THE ANGRY WARMING-PAN 

thought they had never seen anything that 
looked more delicious. 

“I will cut them in three pieces with my 
sword,” said Rudolf. “You may have the 
heads, Ann, and me the middle parts, and 
Peter the tails because he is the youngest.” 

This arrangement did not suit Peter. “I will 
not eat the tails,” he screamed, kicking his 
heels angrily against the rock, — “the tails is 
made out of nassy old string!” And, I am 
sorry to say, Peter made a snatch at both choco- 
late mice and knocked them out of Rudolf’s 
hand. This, of course, made it necessary for 
Rudolf to box Peter’s ears, and a tussle quickly 
followed, in the middle of which something 
dreadful happened. The large flat rock they 
were sitting on gave several queer shakes and 
heaves and then suddenly rose right up under 
the three children and threw them head over 
heels into the air. They were not a bit hurt, 
25 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


but they were very, very much surprised when 
they scrambled to their feet and saw the rock 
erect on a long kind of tail it had, glaring at 
them out of one red angry eye. 

Ann was the first to recognize it. “Oh, oh,” 
she cried, “it’s not a rock at all — it’s Betsy’s 
Warming-pan!” 

The Pan, giving a deep throaty kind of 
growl, began to shuffle toward them. “I’d 
like to have the warming of you three,” he 
snarled. “I’ll teach you to come sitting on top 
of me playing your tricks on my rheumatic 
bones — waking me out of the first good nap 
I’ve had in weeks! — I’ll fix you — ” 

“We’re really very sorry,” Ann began. “We 
didn’t mean to sit on you, we thought — ” 

But the Warming-pan did not want to hear 
what Ann thought. He turned round on her 
fiercely. " You’re the young person,” he 
snapped, “who made the polite remarks about 
26 


THE ANGRY WARMING-PAN 


my figure this evening? Eh, didn’t you? Can 
you deny it? Called me old-fashioned and 
‘country’ — said nobody ever used me any 
more! — I’ll teach you to talk about hot-water 
bottles when I’m through with you!” As he 
spoke he came closer and closer to Ann, snort- 
ing and puffing and glaring at her out of his 
one terrible eye. Although he was so round 
and waddled so clumsily, dragging his long 
tail behind him, his appearance was quite 
dreadful. He reminded Rudolf of the dragon 
in Peter’s picture-book, and he hastily tried to 
imagine how Saint George must have felt 
when defending his princess. Clutching his 
sword, he thrust himself in front of Ann and 
bravely faced the Warming-pan. “Run!” he 
called to the others, “Fly! — and I will fight 
this monster to the death.” 

Ann, dragging Peter by the hand, made off 
as fast as she could go, and the Pan tried his 
27 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

best to dodge Rudolf and rush after her. 
Again and again Rudolf’s sword struck him, 
but it only rattled on his brassiness, and mak- 
ing a horrible face, he popped three live coals 
out of his mouth which rolled on the ground 
unpleasantly close to Rudolf’s bare toes. Then 
they had it hot and heavy until at last the 
knight managed to get his blade entangled 
with the dragon’s long tail, and tripped the 
creature up. Then, without waiting for his 
enemy to get himself together again and heart- 
ily tired of playing Saint George, Rudolf 
turned and ran after Ann and Peter. Long be- 
fore he caught up to them, however, he heard 
the Pan behind him, snorting and scolding. 
Luckily it did not seem able to stop talking, so 
that it lost what little breath it had and was 
soon obliged to halt. For some time Rudolf 
caught snatches of its unpleasant remarks, 
such as — “Children nowadays — wish he had 
28 


THE ANGRY WARMING-PAN 


’em — he’d show ’em — bread and water — 
good thick stick! — ” Rudolf was obliged to 
run with his fingers in his ears before that dis- 
agreeable voice died away in the distance. 

At last he saw Peter and Ann waiting for 
him at a turn in the passage just ahead, and 
in another moment he flung himself panting 
on the ground beside them. “What a beast he 
was!” Rudolf exclaimed. 

“Dreadful!” said Ann. “I shall tell Aunt 
Jane never, never to let Betsy put him in our 
bed again.” And then, after she had thanked 
Rudolf very prettily for saving her life, and 
that hero had recovered his breath and rested 
a little after the excitement of the battle, they 
all felt ready to start on their way again. 

No sooner had they turned the corner ahead 
of them than they found themselves in broad 
daylight. The passage was now so wide that 
all three could walk abreast, holding hands; a 
29 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


moment more and they stood at the mouth of 
the long white cave or tunnel they had been 
walking through. There was open country be- 
yond them, and just opposite to where the chil- 
dred stood was the queerest little house that 
they had ever seen. It was long and very low, 
hardly more than one story high, and was 
painted blue and white in stripes running 
lengthwise. In the middle was a little front 
door with a window on either side of it and 
three square blue and white striped steps lead- 
ing up to it. From the chimney a trail of thick 
white smoke poured out. As the three chil- 
dren stood staring at the house, Peter cried 
out: “It’s snowing!” 

Sure enough the air was full of thick white 
flakes. 

“Oh, dear, oh, dear!” Ann wailed, “what 
shall we do now? We can’t go back in the cave 
because the Warming-pan might catch us, and 


30 


THE ANGRY WARMING-PAN 


if we stay here Peter will catch his death of 
cold out in the snow in his night drawers — and 
so will we all. Oh, what would mother say!” 

“But we are not out in the snow, Ann,” be- 
gan Rudolf in his arguing voice. “We are in 
in the snow.” 

“And it is not wet,” added Peter who was 
trying to roll a snowball out of the white flakes 
that were piling themselves on the ground 
with amazing quickness. 

“I don’t care,” said Ann. “I know mother 
wouldn’t like us to be in in it or out in it. 
I’m going to knock at the door of that house 
this minute and ask if they won’t let us stay 
there till the storm’s over.” 

“All right,” said Rudolf, “only I hope the 
people who live there don’t happen to be any 
relation of the Warming-pan.” 

It was a dreadful thought. The three chil- 
dren looked at the house and hesitated. Then 
3i 


THE ANGRY WARMING-PAN 


Rudolf laughed, drew his precious sword, 
which he had fastened into the belt of his pa- 
jamas, and mounted the steps, the others fol- 
lowing behind him. 

“You be all ready to run,” he whispered, “if 
you don’t like the looks of the person who 
comes. Now!” And he knocked long and 
loud upon the blue and white striped door. 



CHAPTER III 


A VISIT TO THE GOOSE 

The door flew open almost before Rudolf 
had stopped knocking, but there was nothing 
very alarming about the person who stood on 
the threshold. Ann said afterward she had 
thought at first it was a Miss Spriggins who 
came sometimes to sew for her mother, but it 
was not; it was only a very large gray goose 
neatly dressed in blue and white bed-ticking, 
with a large white apron tied round her waist 
and wearing big spectacles with black rims to 
them. 

“Nothing to-day, thank you,” said the 
Goose. 

“But please — ” began Rudolf. 

“No soap, no baking powder, no light- 
33 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


ning rods, no hearth-brooms, no cake tins, no 
life insurance — ” rattled the Goose so rapidly 
that the children could hardly understand her 
— “nothing at all to-day, thank you!” 

“But we want something,” Ann cried, “we 
want to come in !” 

“I never let in peddlers,” said the Goose, 
and she slammed the door in their faces. As 
she slammed it one of her broad apron-strings 
caught in the crack, and Rudolf seized the end 
of it. When the Goose opened the door an 
inch or so to free herself he held on firmly and 
said: 

“Tell us, please, are you the Warming- 
pan’s aunt?” 

The Gray Goose looked immensely pleased, 
but shook her head. 

“Nothing so simple,” said she, “nor, so to 
speak, commonplace, since the relationship or 
connection if you will have it, is, though per- 
34 


A VISIT TO THE GOOSE 


fectly to be distinguished, not always, as it 
were, entirely clear, through his great-grand- 
father who, as I hope you are aware, was a 
Dutch-Oven, having run away with a cousin 
of my mother’s uncle’s stepfather, who was 
three times married, numbers one, two and 
three all having children but none of ’em re- 
sembling one another in the slightest, which, 
as you may have perceived, is only the begin- 
ning of the story, but if you will now come in, 
not forgetting to wipe your feet, and try to fol- 
low me very carefully, I’ll be delighted to ex- 
plain all particulars.” 

The children were glad to follow the 
Lady Goose into the house, though they 
thought she had been quite particular enough. 
They found it impossible to wipe their feet 
upon the mat because it was thick with snow, 
and when the door was closed behind them, 
they were surprised to feel that it was snowing 

V 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


even harder inside the house than it was out. 
For a moment they stood half blinded by the 
storm, unable to see clearly what kind of 
room they were in or to tell whose were the 
voices they heard so plainly. A great flutter- 
ing, cackling, and complaining was going on 
close to them, and a hoarse voice cried out: 

“One hundred and seventeen and three- 
quarters feathers to be multiplied by two- 
sevenths of a pound. That’s a sweet one! Do 
that if you can, Squealer.” 

“You can’t do it yourself,” a whining voice 
replied. “I’ve tried the back and the corners 
and the edges — there’s no more room — ” 

Then came the sound of a sudden smack, as 
if some one’s ears had been boxed when he least 
expected it, and this was followed by a loud 
angry squawk. Now the flakes, which had 
been gradually thinning, died away entirely, 
36 


A VISIT TO THE GOOSE 


and the children suddenly discovered that they 
had not been snowflakes at all but only a cloud 
of white feathers sent whirling through the 
house, out of the windows, and up the chim- 
ney by some disturbance in the midst of a 
great heap in one corner of the room as high 
as a haystack. From the middle of this heap 
of feathers stuck up two very thin yellow legs 
with shabby boots that gave one last despair- 
ing kick and then were still. Near by at a 
counter a Gentleman Goose in a long apron 
was weighing feathers on a very small pair of 
scales, and at his elbow stood a little duck ap- 
prentice with the tears running down his 
cheeks. He was doing sums in a greasy sort of 
butcher’s book that seemed quite full already 
of funny scratchy figures. 

“That must be Squealer, the one who got 
his ears boxed,” whispered Ann to Rudolf, 
37 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“but what do you suppose is the matter 
with the other duck, the one in the heap? He 
will be smothered, I know he will!” 

Rudolf thought so, too, yet it didn’t seem 
polite to mention it. The Lady Goose had 
been busily helping the children to brush off 
the feathers that were sticking to them, and 
patting Peter on the back with her bill be- 
cause he said he was sure he had swallowed at 
least a pound. She now brought forward 
chairs for them all. As the children looked 
around more closely they saw that the room 
they were in was a very cozy sort of place, 
long and low and neatly furnished with a 
white deal table, a shiny black cook-stove, a 
great many bright copper saucepans, and a 
red geranium in the window. A large iron 
pot was boiling merrily on the stove and from 
time to time the Gray Goose stirred its con- 
tents with a wooden spoon. It smelled rather 


A VISIT TO THE GOOSE 

good, and Peter, sniffing, began to put on his 
hungry expression. 

“No, not even a family resemblance,” went 
on the Gray Goose, waving her spoon, “al- 
though, as is generally known, a Roman nose 
is characteristic in our family, having devel- 
oped in fact at the time of that little affair 
when we repelled the Gauls in the year — ” 

But Rudolf felt he could not stand much 
more of this. “I beg your pardon,” he inter- 
rupted, “but would you mind if we helped the 
little one out of the heap, the — the — duck who 
is getting so thoroughly smothered?” 

“Not at all, if you care about it,” said the 
Gray Goose kindly. “Squawker’ll be good 
now, won’t he, Father?” 

“Oh, I’m sure he’ll be good,” Ann cried, 
and she ran ahead of Rudolf to catch hold of 
one of the thin yellow legs and give it a 
mighty pull. 


39 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“He’ll be good,” said the Gentleman Goose 
gravely, speaking for the first time, “when he’s 
roasted. Very good indeed’ll Squawker be — 
with apple sauce!” And he smacked his lips 
and winked at Peter who was standing close 
beside him, looking up earnestly into his face. 

Peter thought a moment. Then he said : “I 
likes currant jelly on my duck. I eats apple 
sauce on goose.” 

The Gentleman Goose appeared suddenly 
uncomfortable. He began nervously stuffing lit- 
tle parcels of the feathers he had been weigh- 
ing into small blue and white striped bags, 
which he threw one after the other to Squealer, 
who never by any chance caught them as he 
turned his back at every throw. “I suppose,” 
said the Gentleman Goose to Peter in a hesi- 
tating, anxious sort of voice, “you believe along 
with all the rest, what’s sauce for the goose is 
sauce for the gander, don’t you? I suppose 
40 


A VISIT TO THE GOOSE 


there’s nothing sauce-y about yourself now, is 
there?” And apparently comforted by his 
miserable little joke he went on with his 
weighing. 

By this time the other little duck had been 
hauled out of the heap of feathers by Ann and 
Rudolf, and stood coughing and sneezing and 
gasping in the middle of the floor. As soon as 
he had breath enough he began calling piti- 
fully for some one to brush the down off his 
Sunday trousers. The Gray Goose came good- 
naturedly to his assistance, but as she brushed 
him all the wrong way, the children couldn’t 
see that she improved him very much. 
Squawker seemed quite pleased, however, and 
turned himself round and round for their ap- 
proval. 

“What kind of birds are these new ones?” 
he asked the Lady Goose when she had fin- 
ished with him. 


41 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“Why just three more of us, Squawker, 
clear,” she answered. 

This remark made all three children open 
their eyes very wide. 

“Nonsense,” began Rudolf angrily, “we 
aren’t geese!” 

From the other end of the room came the 
voice of the Gentleman Goose, who spoke 
without turning round. “What makes you 
think that?” he asked. 

“Because we aren’t — we — ” 

— “You’re molting pretty badly, of course, 
now you mention it,” interrupted the Lady 
Goose, “you and the little one. But this one’s 
feathers seem in nice condition.” As she spoke 
she laid a long claw lovingly on Ann’s head. 
“How much would you say a pound, father?” 

“Can’t say till I get ’em in the scales, of 
course,” and, smoothing down his apron, the 
Gentleman Goose advanced toward Ann in a 
42 


A VISIT TO THE GOOSE 


businesslike fashion. The two little appren- 
tices, carrying bags, followed at his heels. 

Ann clung to Rudolf. “I haven’t any 
feathers,” she screamed. “They’re curls. I’m 
not a nasty bird — I’m a little girl with hair!” 

“She doesn’t want to be plucked!” ex- 
claimed the Gray Goose who had returned to 
the stove to stir the contents of the iron pot. 
“Well, now, did you ever! Maybe it goes in 
her family. I had a great-aunt once on my fa- 
ther’s side who — ” 

“They’re feathers, all right,” chuckled 
Squawker. “You’re a perfect little duck, that’s 
what I think.” 

“Me, too,” chimed in Squealer. 

The Gentleman Goose reached over the 
Lady Goose’s shoulder, snatched the spectacles 
off her nose without so much as by your leave, 
set them crookedly on his own, and looked 
over them long and earnestly at Ann. “So you 
43 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


want to call ’em hair, do you?” he snapped. 
“I suppose you think you belong in a hair 
mattress!” 

Ann was ready to cry, and Rudolf had 
drawn his sword with the intention of doing 
his best to protect her, when at that moment a 
new voice was heard. Looking in at the little 
window over the top of the red geranium the 
children saw a good-humored furry face with 
long bristly whiskers and bright twinkly eyes. 

“Anybody mention my name?” said the 
voice, and a large Belgian Hare leaped lightly 
into the room. He was handsomely dressed 
in a light overcoat and checked trousers, and 
wore gaiters over his patent-leather boots. He 
had a thick gold watch-chain, gold studs and 
cuff buttons besides other jewelry, and in one 
hand he carried a high hat, in the other a 
small dress-suit case and a tightly rolled um- 
brella. 


44 


A VISIT TO THE GOOSE 


“What’s the matter here?” he inquired 
cheerfully. 

“Why, this bird,” explained the Gentleman 
Goose, pointing his claw disdainfully at Ann, 
“says it has no feathers, which you can see for 
yourself is not the case. It has feathers, there- 
fore it is a bird. Birds of a feather flock to- 
gether. That settles it, I think! Come along, 
boys. To work!” 

At his command the two duck apprentices, 
who were standing one on either side of Ann, 
made feeble dashes at the two long curls near- 
est them. Rudolf stepped forward but the 
Hare was before him. He only needed to stare 
at the two ducks through a single eye-glass he 
had screwed into one of his eyes to make them 
turn pale and drop their claws to their sides. 

“Now once more,” said the Hare to Ann. 
“What did you say you call those unpleasantly 
long whiskers of yours?” 

45 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“Hair,” Ann answered meekly, for she was 
too frightened to be offended. 

“Hair!” echoed Rudolf and Peter loudly. 

“Bless me,” said their new friend, “that’s 
not at all my business, is it? Not at all in my 
line — oh, no!” He gathered up his hat, dress- 
suit case, and little umbrella from the floor 
where he had dropped them. “Be sure you 
don’t follow me,” he said, nodding pleasantly 
and winking at the children. Then he stepped 
to the door without so much as a look at the 
Gentleman Goose who called out angrily: 

“Stop, stop! Catch ’em, Squealer — at ’em,. 
Squawker — hold ’em, boys!” 

It was too late. The boys were too much 
afraid of the Hare to do more than flutter and 
squawk a little, and as the Gentleman Goose 
did not seem inclined to make an attack single- 
handed, the Hare, with the children behind 
him, got to the door in safety. Peter, however, 
46 


A VISIT TO THE GOOSE 


had to be dragged along by Ann and Rudolf, 
for the Lady Goose had just removed the great 
pot from the stove in time to prevent its con- 
tents from boiling over, and the little boy was 
sniffing hungrily at the steam. Now she came 
after the children carrying a large spoonful 
of the bubbling stuffi “All done, all done,” she 
cried. “Don’t go without a taste, dears.” 

“What’s done?” asked Peter, eagerly turn- 
ing back to her. 

“Worms, dear; red ones and brown ones,” 
answered the Lady Goose, — “boiled in vine- 
gar, you know — just like mother used to make 
— with a wee bit of a grasshopper here and 
there for flavoring. Mother had the recipe 
handed down in her family — her side — you 
know, from my great-great-grandmother’s 
half-sister who was a De 1’ Oie but married a 
Mr. Gans and was potted in the year — ” 

They got Peter through the door by main 
47 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


force, Ann and Rudolf pushing behind and 
the Hare pulling in front. Even then, I am 
ashamed to say, Peter kept calling out that he 
would like “just a taste”, and he didn’t see why 
the Goose’s worms wouldn’t be just as good as 
the white kind cook sent up with cheese on 
the top ! 




CHAPTER IVj 


THE FALSE HARE 

As THEY hurried away from the Goose’s 
house, the children cast one last look behind 
them. There at the window was the Lady 
Goose waving in farewell the spoon she had 
stirred the hot worms with. Suddenly a whirl 
of white feathers flew out of the chimney, the 
window and the door, which the children in 
their haste had left open behind them, and hid 
her completely from their sight. At the 
same instant two feeble shrieks came from 
within the house. 

“Squealer and Squawker both went into the 
heap that time, I guess,” said Rudolf. 

“I’m glad of it!” Ann cried. “I'd never 
help either of the horrid little things out 
49 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

again. Would you, sir?” she asked, turning 
politely to the Hare. 

“I dare say not,” he answered, yawning. 
“That is, of course, unless I had particularly 
promised not to. In that case I suppose I’d 
have to.” 

All three children looked very much puz- 
zled. 

“Would you mind telling us,” asked Ann 
timidly, “what you meant when you said this” 
— and she touched her hair — “was not your 
business?” 

“Not at all,” said the Hare cheerfully. “I 
meant that it was.” 

“But you said — ” 

“Oh, what I said was, of course, untrue.” 

“Do you mean you tell stories?” Ann looked 
very much shocked, and so did the others. 

“Certainly,” said the Hare, “that’s my busi- 
ness, I’m a False Hare, you know. Oh, dear, 


THE FALSE HARE 


yes, I tell heaps and heaps of stories, as many 
as I possibly can, only sometimes I forget and 
then something true will slip out of me. Oh, 
it’s a hard life, it is, to be thoroughly untruth- 
ful every single day from the time you get up 
in the morning till the time you go to bed at 
night — round and round the clock, you know! 
No eight-hour day for me. Ah, it’s a sad, sad 
life !” He sighed very mournfully, at the same 
time winking at Rudolf in such a funny way 
that the boy burst out laughing. “Take warn- 
ing by me, young man,” he continued sol- 
emnly, “and inquire very, very carefully con- 
cerning whatever business you go into. If I 
had known what the life of a False Hare 
really was, I doubt if I should have ever — 
But, dear me, this will never do — you’re get- 
ting me into mischief! I’ve hardly done so 
much as a fib since we met.” 

“Oh, you mustn’t mind us” said Rudolf, 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


trying hard not to laugh, as he and Ann and 
Peter marched along beside the False Hare. 
“You mustn’t let us interfere with your — your 
business, you know. We sha’n’t mind, at least 
we’ll try not to. Whatever you say we’ll be- 
lieve just the opposite. It’ll be as if he were 
a kind of game,” he added to Ann who was 
still looking very doubtful. She looked hap- 
pier at once, for Ann was quick at games and 
knew it. 

“I think,” said she to the False Hare, “that 
I heard something about you the other day — 
at least I suppose it must have been you. It 
was at a tea-party given by a friend of mine,” 
• — here Ann put on her most grown-up manner 
and made her voice sound as much like her 
mother’s as possible — “a Mrs. Mackenzie who 
lives in the city. One lady said to another lady, 
‘How fashionable false hair is getting!’ ” 

The False Hare stroked his whiskers to 


THE FALSE HARE 


hide a pleased smile. “Bless me,” said he, “I 
should think so! Keeps a fellow on the jump, 
I can tell you — this social whirl. And then, 
when bedtime comes along and a chap ought 
to get a bit of rest after a day’s hard fibbing, 
why then — there’s the dream business. I can’t 
neglect that.” 

The children did not understand and said so. 

“Well,” said the False Hare, “I’ll just ex- 
plain, and then I really must get back to busi- 
ness. Now then, suppose a hound dreams 
about a hare? It’s a dream hare, isn’t it?” 

“Yes, of course,” they cried. 

“And a dream hare is not a real hare, is it? 
And a hare that’s not a real hare is a false hare, 
isn’t it? So there I am. That’s where I come 
in. Simple, isn’t it?” 

“You make it sound simple,” said Rudolf 
politely. “We’re much obliged. And now 
would you mind telling us where we are com- 
53 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


ing to, and what is beyond this steep hill just 
ahead of us?” 

The Hare screwed his glass into his eye and 
looked thoughtfully at the country round 
about. “I can tell you, of course,” he said, 
“but it won’t be the truth. I really must get 
back to business.” 

“Oh, never mind telling us at all, then,” said 
Rudolf, who was becoming rather vexed, “I 
see there’s no use asking you any questions.” 

During their conversation with the False 
Hare, the children had been hurrying along 
over a stretch of open level country. Now the 
ground began to slope gradually upward and 
soon they were climbing a very steep hill. It 
was hard traveling, for the hill was covered 
with thick, fuzzy, whitish-yellow grass which 
tangled itself round their feet, and gave them 
more than one fall. Ann and Rudolf had to 
stop often to pick up Peter, for he was rather 
54 


THE FALSE HARE 


fat and his legs were too short to carry him 
along as fast as theirs did. The False Hare 
hurried ahead by leaps and bounds that would 
soon have carried him out of sight of his 
companions if he had not stopped now and 
then to wait for them. When the children 
caught up to him, they would find him sitting 
on his little dress-suit case, smoking a choco- 
late cigarette, and laughing at them. 

“Oh, don’t mention it,” he would say when 
they apologized for keeping him waiting. “I 
don’t mind. I like waiting for slow-pokes ! It’s 
nothing to me if I miss a dozen appointments 
and get driven out of the dream business by 
that old what’s-his-name — Welsh Rabbit!” 

This sort of talk was rather annoying, and 
after a while the children decided not to heed 
it any longer. Indeed they were all three tired 
with their climb, and were glad to sink down 
on the soft fuzzy grass and rest a while. The 
55 


THE wonderful bed 


False Hare bounded ahead, calling back to 
them “Not to hurry”, but when he found he 
could not tease them into following, he saun- 
tered back to meet them, looking as cool and 
fresh and neat as when he started. Peter had 
been rather in the dumps ever since he had 
been refused a taste of the Lady Goose’s din- 
ner, and now he looked thoughtfully at the 
Hare’s suit case. 

“Has you got anything to eat in there?” he 
asked, his little face brightening. 

“Gracious, yes,” said the False Hare lightly. 
“Lemme see! What do little boys like best? 
Cinnamon buns an’ chocolate cake an’ butter- 
scotch an’ lemon pie an’ soda-water an’ ginger- 
bread an’ jujubes an’ hokey-pokey an ’pop- 
corn balls an’ — ” He might have gone on for- 
ever, but Ann and Rudolf would not stand any 
more of it. They rose angrily and dragging 
Peter after them, continued their climb. Just 
56 


THE FALSE HARE 


as they had almost reached the top of the hill, 
the False Hare bounded past them with a 
laughing salute and a wave of his paw, and 
dropped out of sight over the brink of the 
ridge. A moment more and they all stood on 
the edge of a cliff so steep that they were in 
danger of tumbling over. From beneath the 
Hare’s voice called up to them, “Nobody 
ever thought of a sheet of water — oh , no!” 

Before their eyes lay the last thing the chil- 
dren had expected to see, a large piece of water 
quite calm and smooth, without a sign of a sail 
on it, nor were there any bathers or children 
playing on the narrow strip of beach directly 
beneath them. At first it seemed as if it would 
be impossible for them to climb down the face 
of that steep cliff to the water, but the False 
Hare had done it, and they determined that 
they must manage it somehow. After looking 
about carefully, they found a set of rude steps 
57 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

cut in the side of the cliff. They were very far 
apart, to be sure, for climbers whose legs were 
not of the longest, but Rudolf helped Ann and 
Ann helped Peter and at last they were all 
safely down and standing beside the False 
Hare, who was strolling along the edge of the 
water. 

“Hullo,” said he, sticking his glass in his 
eye and looking at Ann. “What makes the 
whiskerless one so cheerful?” 

Rudolf and Peter were not surprised when 
they turned to look at Ann to see that she was 
ready to cry. 

“What’s the matter, Ann?” they asked. 

“Oh, dear, dear!” sighed Ann. “Whatever 
will become of us now? We can’t go back. 
Even if we could climb up the cliff, I’d never 
pass that dreadful Goose’s house again, no, not 
for anything! But how are we going to get 
any farther without a boat?” 

58 


THE FALSE HARE 


The False Hare pretended to wipe away a 
tear with the back of his paw. “No boat,” he 
groaned. “Oh, dear, dear, dear — no boat!” 

The faces of the three children brightened 
immediately, for they were beginning to un- 
derstand his ways. “Hurrah!” cried Rudolf, 
waving his sword. 

Sure enough, coming round a bend in the 
shore where the bushes had hidden it from 
their sight, was a small boat rowed by two 
white candy mice. 




CHAPTER Vj 


REAL LIVE PIRATES 

AFTER neatly and carefully turning up the 
bottoms of his trousers so that they should not 
get wet, the False Hare bounded on a rock 
that rose out of the water a few feet from 
shore, and stood ready to direct the landing of 
the boat. There was some sense in this, for cer- 
tainly neither of the two mice was what could 
be called good oarsmen. One of them had just 
unshipped the little sail, and — not seeming to 
know what else to do with it — had cut it loose 
from the oar that served as a mast and 
wrapped it round and round his body, tying 
himself tightly with a piece of string. 

Rudolf thought he had never in his life seen 
people in a boat do so many queer and unneces- 
60 


REAL LIVE PIRATES 


sary things in so short a time as those two mice 
did. They would stop rowing every few min- 
utes and begin sweeping out the floor of their 
boat with a small broom, dusting seats, cush- 
ions, and oar-locks with a little feather duster 
tied with a pink ribbon. Then, after a few, 
rapid, nervous strokes at the oars, one or the 
other of them would pull his blade out of the 
water and polish it anxiously with his hand- 
kerchief, as if the important thing was to keep 
it dry. They would probably never have 
reached land that day if this had depended on 
their own efforts, but luckily the breeze was 
blowing them in the right direction. 

All this time the False Hare had been wait- 
ing on the rock, and now as the boat was al- 
most within reach, he began leaping up and 
down, clapping his paws and calling out in 
the heartiest tones: “Go it, my dear old Salts! 
Hurrah, my fine Jack Tars! You’re a pair of 
6 1 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


swell old sea-dogs, you are. Only don’t hurt 
yourselves, you know. We wouldn’t like to see 
you work!” 

It seemed as if the white mice knew the False 
Hare and the value of his remarks, for they 
made no attempt to answer him, but only 
looked more and more frightened and uncom- 
fortable. When their boat was at last beached, 
they jumped out of it, turned their backs to the 
rest of the party, and standing as close together 
as they could get, gazed anxiously out over the 
water. Seen close by there was something fa- 
miliar about the look of these mice to the three 
children, yes, even though they had grown a 
great deal, and had disguised themselves by 
the simple method of licking the chocolate off 
each other! Rudolf and Ann hoped Peter 
would not notice it, but nothing of the sort 
ever escaped him. He walked around in front 
of the two mice, who tried vainly not to meet 
62 


REAL LIVE PIRATES 


his eye, looked at them long and earnestly, and 
said: 

“I say, Mr. Mouses, was you always white?” 

The mice turned a pale greenish color in 
their embarrassment and looked nervously at 
each other, but answered never a word. 

“I thought,” continued Peter, staring stead- 
ily at them, “that last time I saw you you was 
choc’late. Did you wash it off — on purpose?” 
he added sternly. 

“Excuse me, sir, we don’t believe in wash- 
ing,” muttered one of the poor things hastily. 

Ann shook her head at Peter. “Hush!” she 
whispered. “You mustn’t be rude to them 
when they are going to lend us their boat so 
kindly.” Then she asked in a loud voice, hop- 
ing to change the subject: “Who is going to 
row? Will you, Mr. False Hare?” 

“Why certainly, dearie, I adore rowing,” 
said the False Hare sweetly. 

63 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“Then you will have to, Rudolf, and I will 
look after Peter. He is always so apt to fall 
out of a boat. I dare say the mice will be glad 
of a rest.” 

They all got into the boat, Rudolf took the 
oars, Ann sat in the bow with Peter beside her, 
and the False Hare settled himself comfort- 
ably in the stern with a mouse squeezed on 
either side of him. He wanted to pet them a 
little, so he said, but from the strained ex- 
pressions on their faces and the startled 
squeaks they gave from time to time, it seemed 
as if they were hardly enjoying his attentions. 
The children loved being on the water better 
than anything else, and they would have been 
perfectly happy now, if the False Hare had 
not had quite so many nice compliments to 
make to Rudolf on his rowing, and if the 
white mice had not complained so bitterly of 
them all for “sitting all over the boat cush- 
64 


REAL LIVE PIRATES 


ions,” and “wetting the nice dry oars!” They 
were enjoying themselves very much, in spite 
of this, when suddenly Ann, who had very 
sharp eyes, called out: 

“Sail ahead!” 

At first Rudolf thought she had said this 
just because it sounded well, but on turning his 
head he saw for himself a small boat heading 
toward them as fast as it could come. A mo- 
ment more and the children could see the black 
flag floating at its masthead. 

“Oh, oh!” screamed Ann, “that’s a skull and 
cross-bones. It’s a pirate ship!” 

“Hurrah!” Rudolf shouted. “How awfully 
jolly! Just like a book.” 

“Dee-lightful!” the False Hare exclaimed, 
shuddering all over to the tips of his whiskers. 
“If there’s one thing I do dote on it is pirates 
— dear old things!” 

As for the two white mice, after one glance 

65 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


at the ship, they gave two little shrieks and hid 
their faces in their paws. 

Rudolf shipped his oars while he loosened 
his sword. “I shall be prepared to fight, ” said 
he, “though I am afraid we must make up our 
minds to being captured. Our enemy’s boat is 
not so large — it’s not much more than a cat- 
boat — but there are only four of us, as the mice 
don’t count, and I suppose there must be at 
least a dozen of the pirates.” 

The False Hare smiled a sickly sort of 
smile. “And such nice ones,” he murmured. 
“Such gentle, well-behaved, well-brought-up, 
polite pirates! Just the sort your dear parents 
would like to have you meet. Those fellows 
don’t know anything about shooting, stabbing, 
mast-heading or plank-walking; oh, no! They 
don’t do such things.” 

Ann turned pale at the False Hare’s words, 
but Rudolf only laughed. “What luck!” he 
66 


REAL LIVE PIRATES 


exclaimed. “I’m nine years old and I’ve never 
seen a real live pirate, and goodness knows 
when I ever will again — I wouldn’t miss this 
for anything.” Then, as he saw how really 
worried his little sister looked, he added 
cheerfully. “They may sail right past without 
speaking to us, you know.” 

But this was not to be the case. Nearer and 
nearer came the pirate craft until at last the 
children could see, painted in black letters on 
her side, her name, The Merry Mouser. A 
group of pirates was gathered at the rail, star- 
ing at the rowboat through their glasses. 
There was no mistake about these fellows be- 
ing pirates — that was easy enough to see from 
their queer bright-colored clothes and the 
number of weapons they carried, even if the 
ugly black flag had not been floating over 
their heads. At the bow stood he who was 
evidently the Pirate Chief. He was dressed in 

67 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


some kind of tight gray and white striped suit 
with a red sash tied round his waist stuck full 
of shiny-barreled pistols and long bright- 
bladed knives. A red turban decorated his 
head and under it his brows met in the fiercest 
kind of frown. His arms were folded on his 
breast. As Rudolf looked at this fellow, he 
began to have the queerest feeling that some- 
where — somehow — under very different con- 
ditions — he had seen the Pirate Chief before! 

Just at that instant he heard the sound of a 
struggle behind him, and turning round he 
saw that Peter had become terribly excited. 
“Mittens! Mittens!” he screamed, and break- 
ing loose from Ann’s hold, he stood up and 
leaned so far over the side of the boat that he 
lost his balance and fell into the water. Ann 
screamed, the False Hare — I am ashamed to 
say — merely yawned and kept his paws in his 
pockets. Rudolf had kicked off his shoes and 
68 


REAL LIVE PIRATES 


was ready to jump in after Peter, when he saw 
that quick as a flash, on an order from their 
Chief, the pirates had lowered a long rope 
with something bobbing at the end of it. Peter 
when he came to the surface, seized this rope 
and was rapidly hauled on board the pirate 
ship. 

Ann came near falling overboard herself 
in her excitement. “Oh, Ruddy, Ruddy!” she 
begged, “let’s surrender right away quick. We 
can’t leave poor darling Peter to be carried off 
by those terrible cats.” 

“Cats?” said Rudolf, staring stupidly at the 
pirates. “Why so they are cats, Ann! Some- 
how I hadn’t noticed that before. But, look, 
they are sending a boat to us now.” 

In a small boat which had been towed be- 
hind the catboat, a couple of pirates — big, 
rough-looking fellows — were sculling rapidly 
toward the children. Cats indeed they were, 
69 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

but such cats as Ann and Rudolf had never 
seen before, so big and black and bold were 
they, their teeth so sharp and white, their eyes 
so round and yellow! One had a red sash and 
one a green, and each carried knives and pis- 
tols enough to set up a shop. 

“Surrender!” they cried in a businesslike 
kind of way as they laid hold of the bow of 
the rowboat, “or have your throats cut — just 
as you like, you know.” 

Of course the children didn’t like, and then, 
as Ann said, they had to remember Peter. 
Much against his will, Rudolf was now forced 
to surrender his beloved sword. The False 
Hare handed over all his belongings — his jew- 
elry, his suit case, and his little umbrella — 
without the slightest hesitation, humming a 
tune as he did so, but his voice cracked, and 
Ann and Rudolf noticed that the tip of his 
nose had turned quite pale. The prisoners 
70 


REAL LIVE PIRATES 


were quickly transferred to the other boat, and 
the pirate with the green sash took the oars. 
Just as all was ready for the start the cat in 
red cried: 

“Hold on a minute, Growler! I’ll just jump 
back into their old tub to see if we’ve left any 
vallybles behind!” 

“All right, Prowler.” 

It was then and only then that Rudolf and 
Ann remembered the two white mice! The 
last time they had noticed them was at the mo- 
ment of Peter’s ducking when in their excite- 
ment, the foolish creatures had hidden their 
faces on each other’s shoulders, rolled them- 
selves into a kind of ball, and stowed them- 
selves under a seat. Prowler leaped into the 
little boat which the pirates had fastened by a 
tow-rope to their own, and during his search 
he kept his back turned to his companions. He 
was gone but a moment, and when he returned 
7i 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


his whiskers were very shiny, and he was look- 
ing extremely jolly as he hummed a snatch of 
a pirate song. 

“Find anything?” asked Growler, eying 
him suspiciously. “If you did, and don’t fork 
it out before the Chief, you'll catch it. ’Twill 
be as much as your nine lives are worth!” 

“Oh, ’twas nothing — nothing of any im- 
portance,” answered Prowler airily. 

Rudolf and Ann looked at each other, but 
neither of them spoke. Both the pirate cats 
now settled to the oars and the boat skimmed 
along the water in the direction of the Merry 
Mouser. As they drew alongside, Growler 
muttered in a not unfriendly whisper : 

“Look here, youngsters, here’s a word of ad- 
vice that may save you your skins. Don’t show 
any cheek — not to me or Prowler, we’re the 
mates — and above all, not to the Chief!” 


72 


REAL LIVE PIRATES 


“What is your Chief’s name, Mr. Growler, 
dear sir?” asked Ann timidly. 

Growler flashed his white teeth at her. 
Then he looked at Prowler and both mates re- 
peated together as if they were saying a les- 
son: “The name of our illustrious Chief is 
Captain Mittens — Mittens, the Pitiless Pirate 
— Mittens, the Monster of the Main!” 

“Why — why — my Aunt Jane had a tiger 
cat once with white paws — ” Ann began, but 
then she stopped suddenly, for Rudolf had 
given her a sharp pinch. A terrible frown had 
spread over the faces of both Growler and 
Prowler. “Above all” whispered the mate in 
low and earnest tones, “none of that! If you 
don’t want to be keel-hauled, don’t recall his 
shameful past!” 




CHAPTER VI 


ABOARD THE MERRY MOUSER 

When Rudolf and Ann and the False Hare, 
under guard of Growler and Prowler, reached 
the deck of the Merry Mouser , they found 
Peter, dressed in a dry suit of pirate clothing 
and looking none the worse for his wetting. 
He was being closely watched by a big Mal- 
tese pirate whose strong paw with its sharp 
claws outspread rested on his shoulder, but as 
Rudolf and Ann were led past him, he man- 
aged to whisper, “Look out! Mittens is awful 
cross at us!” 

Foolish Ann paid no attention to this warn- 
ing. She was so glad to see her Aunt Jane’s 
pet again that she snatched her hand out of 
Prowler’s paw, and ran toward the Pirate 
74 


ABOARD THE MERRY MOUSER 


Chief. “Kitty, Kitty, don’t you know me?” 
she cried. “Oh, Puss, Puss!” 

For a moment Captain Mittens stood per- 
fectly silent, bristling to the very points of his 
whiskers with passion. Then he ordered in a 
hoarse kind of growl: “Bring the bags.” 

Instantly two ugly black and white spotted 
cats dived into the little cabin and brought 
out an armful of neat, black, cloth bags with 
drawing strings in them. “One moment,” 
commanded Mittens in a very stern voice, 
“any plunder?” 

Growler, the mate, bowed low before his 
chief. “ ’Ere’s a werry ’andsome weapon, sir,” 
said he, handing over Rudolf’s sword. “Noth- 
ing else on the little ones, sir, but this ’ere gen- 
tleman” — pointing to the False Hare — “was 
loaded down with jools.” 

Hearty cheers sprang from the furry throats 
of the crew, while broad grins spread over 
75 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

their whiskered faces as they listened to this 
pleasing news. 

“Silence,” snarled Mittens — and every cat 
was still. “Now then,” he commanded 
Growler, “hand ’em over.” 

Very much against his will, Growler emp- 
tied his pockets of the False Hare’s jewelry 
and handed it over to his Chief. Mittens 
took the gold watch and chain, the flashing pin 
and studs, the beautiful diamond ring and put 
them all on, glaring defiantly at his crew as he 
did so. So fierce was that scowl of his, so 
sharp and white the teeth he flashed at them, 
so round and terrible his gleaming yellow eyes 
that not a cat dared object, though the faces 
of all plainly showed their anger and disap- 
pointment at this unfair division of the spoils. 

“Now, what’s in there” demanded Mittens, 
as he gave a contemptuous kick to the False 
Hare’s dress-suit case. Growler opened it and 
76 


ABOARD THE MERRY MOUSER 


took out a dozen paper collars, a little pair of 
pink paper pajamas, and a small black bottle 
labeled “Hare Restorer.” 

“All of ’em worth about two cents retail,” 
snorted Mittens with a bitter look at the False 
Hare. “And that umbrella, I see, is not made 
to go up! Huh! Drowning’s too good for 
you!” 

“I feel so myself, sir,” said the False Hare 
humbly. “You see,” he added, wiping away 
a tear with the back of his paw, “I’m so fond 
of the water!” 

Mittens thought a moment, keeping his eye 
firmly fastened on the Hare. “I’ll fix you,” he 
cried, “I’ll tie you up in one of those bags!” 

The False Hare put his paw behind his ear. 
“Bags?” said he. “Excuse me, sir, but did you 
say bags?” 

“Yes, I did,” roared the Pirate Chief. 
“Bags! Bags! Bags!” 


77 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“Oh, thank you!” cried the False Hare 
cheerily. “Just my favorite resting-place — a 
nice snug bag. Mind you have them draw the 
string tight, won’t you?” 

Mittens flew into a terrible passion. “I have 
it,” he roared, “I’ll send you adrift! Here, 
boys, get that boat ready!” 

Then the Hare began to cry, to sob, to beg 
for mercy, till the children felt actually 
ashamed of him. “Look here, Mittens,” Ru- 
dolf began. 

“Captain Mittens,” corrected the pirate 
coldly. 

It was hard for Rudolf, but he dared not 
anger the pirate cat any further. “Don’t hurt 
him, please, Captain Mittens,” he begged. 
“He’s only a — ” Then he stopped, for the 
False Hare was making a terrible face at him 
behind the handkerchief with which he was 
pretending to wipe his eyes. 

78 


ABOARD THE MERRY MOUSER 


“Tie his paws!” commanded Mittens, with- 
out so much as a look at Rudolf. “There — 
that’s a nice bit of string hanging out of his 
pocket — take that. Now — chuck him in the 
boat!” 

In a trice the black and white spotted cats, 
who seemed to be common sailors, had tied the 
False Hare’s paws behind him with his own 
string, lowered him into the mice’s little boat 
from which they had already removed the 
oars, gave it a push, and sent him cruelly 
adrift! 

“Oh, Rudolf,” cried tender-hearted Ann, 
“what will become of him? Poor old Hare!” 

“Po-o-o-r old Hare,” came back a dismal 
echo from the little boat already some distance 
away. Then they saw that the False Hare had 
freed his paws — that string must have been 
made of paper like his clothes and his um- 
brella — and was standing up in his boat wav- 
79 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


in g a gay farewell to all aboard the Merry 
Mo user . 

“Good-by, kidlets!” he called in mocking 
tones. “Hope you have a good time with the 
tabbies!’’ And then to Mittens, “Good-by, old 
Whiskers !” 

At this insult to their Chief all the pirate 
cats began firing their revolvers, but their aim 
must have been very poor indeed, as none of 
their shots came anywhere near the Hare’s 
boat. Indeed, a great many of the cats had for- 
gotten to load their weapons, though they kept 
snapping away at their triggers as if that did 
not matter in the slightest. The False Hare 
merely bowed, kissed his paw to Captain Mit- 
tens, and then began using his silk hat as a 
paddle so skilfully that in a few moments he 
was far beyond their range. 

Growler edged up to Prowler. “I say, old 
80 


ABOARD THE MERRY MOUSER 


chap,” he chuckled, “I s’pose that’s what they 
mean by a hare-breadth escape?” 

Prowler grinned. “It’s one on the Chief, 
anyway,” said he joyfully. “Not a breath of 
wind, ye know, not so much as a catspaw — 
no chance of a chase.” 

“What’s that?” Captain Mittens had crept 
up behincf the two mates and bawled in 
Prowler’s ear. “What’s that? No wind? Why 
not, I’d like to know? What d’ye mean by 
running out o’ wind? Head her for Catnip 
Island this instant, or I’ll have ye skinned!” 

“Yes, sir, I’ll do my best, sir,” answered 
Prowler meekly. “But you see, sir, the breeze 
havin’ died, sir, it’ll be a tough job to get the 
Merry Mouser — ” 

“Prowler!” The chief, who had been stand- 
ing close beside the unlucky mate while he 
spoke, now came closer yet and fixed his ter- 


THE WONDERFUL 1 BED 


rible eye on Prowler’s shining whiskers. 
“How long,” he asked, speaking very slowly 
and distinctly, “is — it — since — you — have — 
tasted mouse?” 

Prowler trembled all over. “A — a — week, 
sir,” he mumbled, “that is, I couldn’t swear to 
the date, sir, but ’twas at my aunt’s and she 

t 

never has us to tea on a Monday, for that’s 
wash-day, nor on a Tuesday, for that’s mis- 
sionary, so it must ’a’ been — ” 

“No use, ’t won’t work, Prowler.” The 
Chief grinned and waved a paw to one of the 
spotted sailors. “Here, you, bring along the 
Cat-O’-Nine-Tails !” 

At this the children were immediately very 
much interested, for they had never in their 
lives seen a cat with more than one tail. 

“It would take nine times as much pull- 
ing — ” Rudolf was whispering to Peter, when 
he noticed a new commotion among the sailors. 

82 


ABOARD THE MERRY MOUSER 

The black and white sea-cat had turned to 
carry out the Chief’s order when suddenly 
some one called out “A breeze, a breeze!” and 
in the excitement of getting the Merry Mouser 
under way, the captain’s attention was turned, 
and Prowler and his crime were forgotten. 

All this time Ann and Rudolf and Peter had 
been standing a little apart from the rest under 
guard of the Maltese pirate at whose feet lay 
the dreadful black bags all ready for use. In 
the confusion Rudolf turned to Ann and whis- 
pered, “Do you suppose we could possibly stir 
up a mutiny? Prowler must be pretty sore 
against the Chief! If we could only get him 
and Growler on our side and make them help 
us seize Mittens and drop him overboard.” 

But Ann shook her head, and as for Peter 
he doubled up his little fists and cried out 
loud: “Nobody sha’n’t touch my Mittens! I 
don’t care if he is a pirate cat. I’m going to 

83 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


ask my Aunt Jane if I can’t take him home 
with me to Thirty-fourth Street!” 

“Sh — sh !” Ann whispered, putting her hand 
over his mouth, but it was too late! Mittens 
had crept stealthily up behind Peter and now 
he popped one of the black bags over his head. 
At the same instant, Ann, kicking and strug- 
gling, vanished into another held open by two 
of the spotted cats, and before Rudolf could 
rush to her rescue a third bag descended over 
his own head. It was no use struggling, yet 
struggle they did, till Mittens sent three of the 
spotted sailors to sit on them, and then they 
soon quieted down. There were one or two 
small breathing holes in each bag, or else the 
children would surely have suffocated, so stout 
and heavy were those spotted cats. After what 
seemed to them a very long time a cry of 
“Land ho!” was raised, and the cats got up and 
rushed away to join in the general fuss and 
84 


ABOARD THE MERRY MOUSER 


confusion of getting the Merry Mouser ready 
for her landing. 

Rudolf had been working his hardest at one 
of the holes in his bag and soon he was able 
to get a good view of his immediate surround- 
ings. 

“Cheer up!” he called to Ann and Peter. 
“We’re coming close to the island.” 

“Has it got coral reefs and palm-trees and 
cocoanuts and savages, friendly ones, I mean?” 
came in muffled tones from Ann’s bag. 

“Has it got monkeys and serpents an’ tur- 
tles an’ — an’ — shell-fish?” demanded Peter 
from his. 

“N-no,” said Rudolf, “I don’t see any of 
those things yet . There are a great many trees, 
some of ’em coming most down to the edge of 
the water, but they’re not palm-trees, they’re 
willows, the kind you pick the little furry gray 
things off in early spring — ” 

85 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“Pussy-willows, of course, stupid!” inter- 
rupted Ann. 

“Yes, and back of that there are fields with 
tall reeds or grasses with brown tips to them.” 

“Cattails!” giggled Ann. 

“And there’s a big high cliff, too, with a lit- 
tle stream of water running down, and — ” But 
here Rudolf stopped, for Growler and 
Prowler rushed up, cut the strings of the three 
bags, and released the children from their im- 
prisonment. Hardly did they have time to 
stretch themselves before the Merry Mouser 
brought up alongside her landing-place, and 
in a moment more the children were being led 
ashore, each under guard of a cat pirate to 
prevent escape. 




CHAPTER VII 

CATNIP ISLAND 


Little cats, big cats, black, white, gray, 
yellow, striped, spotted, Maltese, tortoise-shell, 
calico, and tiger cats! Cats of all sizes and all 
kinds, cats of all ages, from tiny furry babies 
wheeled in perambulators by their mamas to 
gray old grandpas hobbling along by the aid 
of canes or crutches — all the cats of Catnip Is- 
land had trooped down to the shore to watch 
the landing of the Merry Mouser. Captain 
Mittens, decked out in the False Hare’s jew- 
elry, was the first to leave the pirate ship. He 
stepped along jauntily, nose in the air and the 
haughtiest kind of expression on his whiskered 
face. After him came Growler leading Ru- 

87 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


dolf, then Prowler with Ann, then the Mal- 
tese pirate with Peter by the hand. The 
spotted sailors brought up the rear, all but 
two who had been left to guard the ship. As 
soon as the shore cats saw that their Chief had 
brought home three prisoners from his cruise, 
they set up a great yowl of joy, and began to 
dance, prancing and bounding in the air and 
whirling round and round upon their hind 
legs. 

“Oh, my eye!” exclaimed Rudolf, quite for- 
getting where he was and standing still to 
watch their antics. “Don’t I wish I had my 
sling shot!” 

“Hush! Silence — ’nless ye want to be 
skinned!” It was the voice of Prowler just be- 
hind him. 

“If you think I’m afraid of a lot of silly 
cats — ” began Rudolf, but his voice was 
drowned by the angry yowls that burst from 


WZ> 



Captain Mittens was the first to leave the pirate ship. 

















































































CATNIP ISLAND 


a hundred furry throats as the islanders 
pressed closer and closer. 

“Oh, Rudolf, do be quiet!” Ann begged, and 
Rudolf, remembering that he was not only a 
long way from his sling shot, but that even his 
sword had been taken away from him, was 
obliged to submit. By this time the pirates 
had cleared a way through the crowd and the 
procession left the beach and entered the 
pussy-willow grove which Rudolf had de- 
scribed from the deck of the Merry Mauser . 
Half hidden among the trees were a number 
of pretty little houses, each with a neat door 
yard and a high back fence. Each had its 
name, too, on a small door plate, and it amused 
Ann and Peter to spell out as they went along 
— “Furryfield,” “Mousetail Manor,” “Kitten- 
cote,” etc. 

“Oh, look,” Ann whispered, “see the dar- 
ling, little, front doors, Peter! Just like the 
89 


THE WONDERFUL RED 


cat-hole in Aunt Jane’s big door. The chim- 
neys are shaped something like ears and the 
roofs are all covered with fur!” 

“Yes,” answered Peter, “and they’ve got lit- 
tle gardens to ’em, Ann. I guess that must be 
the catnip we smell so strong. I don’t see any 
flowers, though, only big tall weeds, rows and 
rows of ’em — milkweed — that’s what it is! 
What do you suppose they planted that for?” 

Prowler, who was walking just ahead of 
Peter, overheard this last remark, and turning, 
fixed his large, round, yellow eyes on the little 
boy. “Don’t you like milk, young man?” he 
asked. 

“Why, yes,” said Peter, very puzzled, “but 
not that kind, you know.” 

“Well, milk’s milk these hard times,” said 
Prowler, wagging his head. “It don’t do to be 
too particerler. You like mice, don’t you?” he 
continued. 


90 


CATNIP ISLAND 


“Why, I like candy mice,” said Peter grin- 
ning, “but I never knew before that cats did!” 

“Sh-sh!” Poor Prowler began to tremble 
all over and look anxiously about him. “Not 
a word of that,” he murmured, “or I’m a dead 
cat! You keep mum about that little affair, 
young’un, and I’ll do you a good turn yet, see 
if I don’t!” 

“All right; don’t you forget!” whispered 
Peter. 

The procession was now approaching a 
house considerably larger than any of the 
others and which had “The Pirattery” written 
in large letters over its door. Mittens led the 
way inside, the mates with the children and all 
the other pirates followed, together with as 
many of the island cats as could squeeze them- 
selves in. The Pirattery, so the children were 
informed by Growler and Prowler, was an as- 
sembly hall or general meeting-place for the 
9i 


iTHE WONDERFUL BED 


pirates when on shore. Its floor and the little 
platform at one end were strewn with rat-skin 
rugs of the finest quality, and its walls were 
adorned with handsomely stuffed and mounted 
mouse and fish heads, snake skins, and other 
trophies of the chase. 

Mittens now took up his position on the 
platform and began a long and eloquent 
speech in which he related the story of the cap- 
ture of his prisoners, making the most absurd 
boasts of the terrible risks he had run, and 
dwelling most particularly on the awful fate 
of the False Hare — while quite forgetting to 
mention his escape. This speech was inter- 
rupted by tremendous cheers from the island 
cats which were only faintly joined in by the 
pirates. Mittens finished by saying that a con- 
cert in celebration of the victory would now be 
given, after which there would be refresh- 
ments — Peter pricked up his ears at the word! 


92 


CATNIP ISLAND 


— and then the plunder taken from the prison- 
ers would be distributed among the officers 
and crew of the Merry Mouser . This last an- 
nouncement was greeted by a volley of shrill 
and joyful yowls from the younger cat pirates, 
but Growler, frowning, whispered in Rudolf’s 
ear: 

“Don’t you believe a word of that, about 
whacking up on the treasure! He’ll never 
give up so much as a single shirt stud, he 
won’t.” 

“I would ’a’ liked them pink pajamas, I 
would,” sighed Prowler. “They’d just suit my 
dark complexion.” 

“I can’t understand,” said Ann, “what it is 
that has made such a change in Mittens ! Why, 
just yesterday when we got to Aunt Jane’s he 
was asleep before the fire with a little red bow 
on his collar — just as soft and nice as anything, 
and he let us all take turns holding him!” 


93 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“He never scratched really deep all day,” 
said Peter mournfully, “only when we dressed 
him up in the doll’s clothes — he didn’t seem to 
’predate that — an’ — an’ when I pulled his tail 
— he didn’t like that, neither.” 

“He’s a bad old thief, that’s what he is!” ex- 
claimed Rudolf, forgetting in his excitement 
to lower his voice. “And if we ever get back 
to Aunt Jane’s and he’s there, Til fix him — ” 

A general warning hiss went up from the 
pirate cats who stood nearest to the children. 
“Be quiet,” muttered Growler, “unless you 
want your ears bitten off? Don’t you see the 
Chief is going to sing?” 

Mittens had stepped to the front of the plat- 
form and was fixing an angry scowl upon the 
three children who stood between Growler 
and Prowler directly beneath him. When all 
was so quiet in the hall you could have heard 
a pin drop, the Chief cleared his throat and 
94 


CATNIP ISLAND 


nodded to the Maltese pirate who stood ready 
to accompany him upon the tambourine. In 
the background a semicircle of other singers 
clutched their music and shuffled their feet 
rather nervously as they waited to come in at 
the chorus. 

Mittens sang in a high plaintive voice: 

“When I was young, you know, 

Not very long ago, 

I was a mild, a happy Pussy-cat! 

My fur was soft as silk, 

I lived on bread and milk, 

And I dozed away my days upon the mat!” 

Chorus 

(“He was then a happy, happy Pussy-catl”) 

“I really blush to say 
How idly I would play 
With my tail or silly spool upon the floor — 
Till one unlucky day 
Three children came to stay — 

After that I wasn’t happy any more.” 


95 


THE WONDERFUL BED 
Chorus 

(“No, indeed, he wasn’t happy any more!”) 

“They drove me nearly wild, 

My temper, once so mild, 

They spoiled — the truth of that you’ll say is 
plain — 

So I ran away to sea — 

’Tis a pirate’s life for me, 

And I’ll never be a Pussy-cat again!” 

Chorus 

(“No, he'll never be a Pussy-cat again!”) 

You may be sure that Rudolf and Ann did 
not join in the burst of applause which greeted 
the end of Captain Mittens’ song. Peter would 
have been glad to, for he was too young and 
foolish to understand how really impertinent 
Mittens had been, but his brother and sister 
quickly stopped that. As for Growler and 
Prowler, they merely yawned, as if they had 
heard this song more than once before, only 
96 


CATNIP ISLAND 


faintly clapping their paws together in order 
not to attract the tyrant’s attention to them- 
selves. The next piece on the program, 
so Mittens announced, would be a duet be- 
tween himself and Miss Tabitha Tortoise, en- 
titled Moonbeams on the Back Fence. This 
selection proved so very noisy, so full of qua- 
vers, trills, and loud and piercing yowls, that 
the children decided it would be safe to at- 
tempt a little conversation. 

“Oh, Rudolf,” whispered Ann, “how shall 
we ever get away from here?” 

“Don’t want to get away,” grumbled Peter. 
“We’re going to have refreshments; Mittens 
said so.” 

“Nonsense; you’ll have to go if we do,” an- 
swered Rudolf. “But listen, what are the 
mates saying?” 

The two black cat pirates were conversing 
excitedly under cover of the music, and pres- 
97 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

ently the children heard what Prowler was 
whispering to Growler: “Look here, Matey, 
where’s the rest of the swag, the suit case and 
his sword, you know?” 

“On board ship, stowed away in Cap’n’s 
cabin,” answered Growler. “You don’t mean 
to—” 

“Yes, I do — I’m no ’fraid-cat — I mean to 
have them pink pajamas, or — ” 

“And where do I come in, eh?” exclaimed 
Growler indignantly. 

“Oh, you can have the shirts and collars, 
Matey. Share and share alike, you know. 
We’ll just slip off to the ship, and — ” 

“And take us with you,” broke in Rudolf. 
“Do!” 

“You know you promised to do us a good 
turn,” whispered Ann. “And if you don’t take 
us we’ll tell, and we’ll tell about what hap- 
pened to the white mice, too — ” 

98 


CATNIP ISLAND 


“And while you’re about it,” went on Ru- 
dolf, “you’d better take possession of the 
vessel. Between us we can easily manage 
those old spotties that were left on board. 
Then, don’t you see, when you fellows are mas- 
ters of the Merry Mouser, you’ll have Mittens 
in your power and you can make him whack 
up on all the treasure!” 

At this brilliant suggestion the two mates 
gave a smothered cheer, gazing at each other 
with their round yellow eyes full of joy and 
their whiskered mouths grinning so widely 
that the children could see their little red 
tongues and all their sharp white teeth. 

“But how shall we get away without being 
seen?” Ann asked. 

“Oh, that’ll be all right,” said Prowler, 
looking about him nervously. “Just wait till 
you hear ’em announce the refreshments — that 
always means a rush, you know. Then slip 


99 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


through the crowd and out by that door be- 
hind the curtain, and hustle down to the ship 
just as fast as ever you can lay your paws to 
the ground!” 

Prowler had hardly finished speaking be- 
fore, with a final long-drawn piercing yowl, 
the duet of the Pirate Chief and Miss Tab- 
itha Tortoise came to an end, and an intermis- 
sion of ten minutes for refreshments was an- 
nounced. From an inner room at the back of 
the hall a dozen or so white cats in caps and 
aprons trotted forth bearing large trays loaded 
with very curious-looking cat-eatables. 

Rudolf and Ann had now their usual trou- 
ble with Peter who at first absolutely refused to 
budge until he had tasted at least “one of each”. 
When at last he was made to understand that 
the trays around which the cats were so greed- 
ily thronging contained nothing more inviting 
than roasted rats and pickled fish fins, and that 


ioo 


CATNIP ISLAND 


these delicacies would probably not be offered 
to prisoners anyway, he regretfully allowed 
himself to be pushed through a door at the 
side of the hall and hurried off in the direc- 
tion of the shore. Although the children, fol- 
lowed closely by the two mates, had managed 
to slip away almost unnoticed in the general 
excitement, yet they knew their escape must 
soon be discovered and they ran as fast as ever 
they could go. 

At last they reached the wharf and 
scrambled up the side of the Merry 
Mouser , expecting each instant to receive some 
kind of challenge from the two spotted cats on 
guard. Much to their surprise they received 
none. This was soon explained, for the two 
common sailors were found in the cabin, 
curled up in the Captain’s bunk, fast asleep. 

“A nice mess they’d be in if the Chief 
caught ’em!” cried Growler. 

IOI 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


Prowler said nothing, but winked at his 
friend, and taking a piece of strong string 
from his pocket, he bound the poor spotted 
cats’ eight paws all in a bunch together and 
left them to continue their nap. This little 
matter attended to, all hands now turned their 
attention to raising the sail, and by the time 
the advance-guard of cat pirates came rushing 
down through the pussy-willow grove in their 
pursuit, the Merry Mouser, borne along by a 
breeze that was something more than a cats- 
paw, was fast leaving the shores of Catnip Is- 
land behind her. 



CHAPTER VIII 


MUTINY ON BOARD 

For some time the children leaned over the 
rail looking back at the group of cats gathered 
at the water’s edge. The form of the Pirate 
Chief towered above them all as he ran up and 
down the beach yowling out all sorts of com- 
mands to which was paid very little attention 
by any one, and stopping every little while 
to flourish an angry paw in the direction of the 
Merry Mouser . 

Peter regarded him sadly. “Poor old 
Mitts,” he sighed, “it was an awful mean trick 
to play on him! He hasn’t got any other boat 
and he looks so mad, I b’lieve he’d swim after 
us if he could.” 

“He could, all right,” said Prowler gravely, 


103 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“but he’d get his paws wet, and that’s a serious 
thing, you know.” 

Rudolf and Ann burst out laughing, and 
even Peter smiled, for it seemed to them a 
funny thing for a pirate to fuss about. 

“Now,” exclaimed Rudolf, as the breeze 
freshened and the forms of the cat pirates be- 
gan to fade from sight, “there’s a great deal to 
be attended to. What do you think we’d better 
get at first?” 

“My pink pajamas!” cried Prowler, leaping 
in the air and turning a double somersault in 
his delight. 

“My paper collars!” shouted Growler, fol- 
lowing his example. 

Rudolf was disgusted with the two mates 
for thinking of such nonsense at a time like 
this, but it was no use trying to do anything 
with them. They left the Merry Mouser to 
his management, and rushed below to bring 


MUTINY ON BOARD 


up the False Hare’s suit case. When they re- 
turned they were followed by the two spotted 
sailors whom they introduced to the children 
as Toddles and Towser. Toddles and Towser 
were still very sleepy. They had managed to 
free themselves by chewing the string that 
bound their paws, but they did not seem at all 
disturbed by the change in affairs or inclined 
to make any trouble. 

Rudolf placed them both at the wheel 
with stern directions to keep each other 
awake if possible. He then went below 
to see if he could find his sword be- 
fore either Growler or Prowler should take 
a fancy to it. It was hanging up over Captain 
Mittens’ berth, and under the Chief’s pillow, 
neatly folded ready for the night, Rudolf 
found Peter’s pajamas. As they were quite 
dry now, he called Peter and insisted on his 
putting them on, much against the little boy’s 
105 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


wishes, for hot and tight and furry as his bor- 
rowed suit had been, Peter had felt gloriously 
like a pirate in it! Very sulkily he followed 
his brother out of the cabin, but when the two 
had mounted to the deck Peter’s sulks gave 
way to a burst of giggles at the sight of 
Growler and Prowler. 

Ann was sitting on the deck quite weak with 
laughter, while the two mates, dressed in their 
stolen finery, paraded up and down in front of 
her. Prowler’s pink pajamas were a better fit 
for him than Growler’s paper collar which 
nearly concealed his pirate’s nose, only the 
points of his whiskers and the tips of his black 
ears showing. Ann had added to his costume 
by the loan of her blue hair-ribbon which she 
had tied in a nice bow on the tip of his tail. 
But Prowler, if possible, looked even more 
silly than Growler, for he copied the actions 
of Captain Mittens as closely as he could, 
106 


MUTINY ON BOARD 


folding his paws on his chest and scowling 
gloomily about him. He seemed extremely 
vexed when the children laughed, but they 
really could not help it, since a pirate in pink 
pajamas is not particularly dreadful. At last, 
after much coaxing, Rudolf got the whole 
party to sit down in a circle on the deck and 
consult with him on some plan of action. 

“We must make up our minds,” said he 
firmly, “on where we are going, and what is 
the nearest land, and what we are going to do 
when we get there, and who is in command of 
the Merry Mouser, anyway, and — ” 

Here he was interrupted by Prowler who 
said would he please go a little slower, for 
Rudolf was making his head ache and it re- 
minded him of going to his aunt’s to say his 
catechism. 

“The thing ter do,” drawled Growler sleep- 
ily, “is ter do nothin’ ’tall till ye git some- 
107 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


wheres where somethin’s gotter be did, an’ 
then like’s not it’s too late ter do anything an’ 
all yer trouble’s saved for ye!” 

Rudolf did not think much of this as ad- 
vice, but Prowler seemed delighted. “Hurrah, 
my hearties!” he shouted, and up he jumped, 
stood on his furry head on the deck, and waved 
his pink pajamaed legs in the air. “Now we 
can have our tea!” he cried. 

The faces of the three children brightened 
at the pleasant thought of tea, and when the 
tray arrived, carried by Towser, Ann asked 
if she might pour. 

“Paw away!” cried Prowler, grinning 
widely as he fixed his round yellow eyes on a 
small covered dish that Toddles had just set 
before him. 

Ann lifted the cover of the tea-pot to peep 
inside but as she sniffed the steam an expres- 
fio8 


MUTINY ON BOARD 


sion of disgust wrinkled up her little nose. 
“Ugh!” she cried, “it’s catnip tea.” 

“Course it is,” answered Prowler calmly. 
“Catnip tea and stewed mouses’ tails — an’ I 
asks what could anybody want nicer?” 

“Little girls that don’t like what’s put be- 
fore ’em can go without. Ever hear anything 
like that before?” asked Growler sweetly, and 
as he spoke he reached over and took the cov- 
ered dish away from Prowler and helped him- 
self to it largely. 

“But we don’t any of us like this kind of a 
tea!” cried Rudolf angrily. 

“Then all the more for us that does,” said 
Prowler, and he snatched the dish in his turn 
away from Growler and emptied all that was 
left of it on his own plate. Since there was 
nothing else for the children to do, they sat 
and watched the two mates eat, all of them 
109 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


feeling decidedly cross, especially Peter. 
When every drop was finished and every 
crumb licked up, Growler said to Prowler, 
“Time for a nap, old boy,” and without so 
much as a look in the children’s direction the 
two rude fellows turned tail and marched off 
arm in arm to their bunks. 

“Well, they are nice!” cried Ann. “And 
what are we going to do, I would like to 
know?” 

“What we are going to do,” said Rudolf 
thoughtfully, “is probably to be shipwrecked. 
Oh, not right away,” he added quickly as he 
saw how frightened his little sister looked. 
“But there’s land close ahead, as sure as sure 
can be, and, if I’m not much mistaken, Tod- 
dles and Towser have both gone to sleep at the 
wheel.” 

It was true. The two common sea-cats had 
left the wheel to take care of itself and had 


no 


MUTINY ON BOARD 


curled themselves up in a soft round ball on 
the deck for a nap from which the children 
found it impossible to arouse them. 

“I will try to steer and also mind the sheet, 
I think that’s what it’s called,” said Rudolf, 
“but as I don’t know much about sailing a boat 
except what I’ve read in books, and you and 
Peter don’t know anything , I think the least 
we’ll do will be to run her aground.” 

“Let’s try to wake Growler and Prowler 
up,” Ann begged. “They can’t be sound asleep 
yet.” 

The two mates were not only sound asleep 
but snoring loudly. Ann and Peter tried shak- 
ing them, spanking them, even drenching 
them with the cold remains of the catnip tea, 
but it was all no use, they could not get them 
to stir. Meanwhile the Merry Mouser was 
drifting dangerously near land, in spite of all 
Rudolf could do to prevent her. He did sev- 


in 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


eral things and he ordered Peter and Ann to 
do a good many others, but all of them felt 
glad the False Hare was not there to compli- 
ment them on their seamanship. At last there 
came a dull shock and a jar, and the Merry 
Mouser ran her nose into a sand-bar, quivered 
all over, and then stood still. 

“The thing to do now/' said Rudolf easily, 
just as if he had planned it all, “is for us to get 
into the little boat we are towing and row our- 
selves ashore. Of course we must wake up the 
mates and the crew and take them with us.” 

It was simply astonishing the things those 
children had to do to Growler and Prowler 
before they could get either of them so much 
as to open an eye! When they were at last 
able to understand what had happened, they 
merely turned over and growled out: “Oh, is 
that all? Aground, are we? Ye needn’t have 
waked us up for that! Be off as soon as ye like 


1 12 


MUTINY ON BOARD 


and give us some rest — do!” They had hardly 
left off speaking before they were sound asleep 
again. As for Toddles and Towser they re- 
fused to wake at all. 

The children left them where they lay and 
climbed over the side of the Merry Mauser 
into the little rowboat which Rudolf had 
brought alongside. When all were safely 
aboard, he cut loose the tow-rope, took the 
oars, and pulled away from the pirate ship. 
After a short and pleasant row they reached a 
gently shelving beach where it was not diffi- 
cult to make a landing. 




CHAPTER IX 

CAPTAIN JINKS 


,Ann stood and stared at the line of low hills 
that fringed the edge of the water. “What 
funny, funny country!” she exclaimed. “It’s 
like a checker-board going up-hill.” 

“No, it isn’t either,” said Rudolf, who loved 
to disagree, “because the squares are not 
square, they’re all different shapes and sizes 
and they’re not just red and black but ever and 
ever so many different colors.” 

“It’s something like the countries in the 
geography maps, anyway,” said Ann. 

“It’s like patchwork,” said Peter, and he 
came nearest the truth. 

As it did not seem likely they would need 
the little boat again, the children left it to float 
1 14 


CAPTAIN JINKS 


away if it liked, and crossed the strip of gray 
sand to where they saw a little pink and white 
striped path winding up the side of a crimson 
hill. This path they began to follow, and it 
took them by so many twists and turns that they 
hardly noticed the climb. When the last loop 
brought them to the top of the slope they stood 
still and looked about them, surprised and de- 
lighted at the beauty of the bare bright hills 
that sloped away in front of them. 

The ground under their feet was now 
a bright beautiful yellow, powdered all 
over with little white dots that proved 
to be daisies. With shouts of delight, Ann 
and Peter stooped to gather these, but 
Rudolf cried out: “Oh, look, look! Don’t 
let’s stop here. It’s prettier yet farther on!” 
So on they ran, all three of them, over the yel- 
low ground, over a stretch of green and blue 
checks, across a lavender meadow, and found 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


themselves at last in a wonderful pale blue 
field scattered all over with bunches of little 
pink roses. 

“This is the prettiest yet,” exclaimed Ann, 
“though of course it is very old-fashioned. I 
wonder what it reminds me of? Ruddy, do 
you remember that picture of Aunt Jane when 
she was little in such a funny dress with low 
neck and short sleeves — ” 

The children had been wandering across the 
field as Ann spoke, stopping to pull a rose 
here and there, too busy and too happy to no- 
tice where their feet were taking them. All at 
once they looked up and saw that they had 
come to the end of the pale blue field where it 
bordered on a broad brown road. Just ahead 
of them stood a little white tent, and from the 
door of the tent two tin soldiers suddenly 
sprang out, shouldered arms, and cried: 
“Halt!” 

'116 


CAPTAIN JINKS 

Of course the children halted. There was 
nothing else to do, so astonished were they to 
meet any one when they had supposed them- 
selves to be in quite a wild and uninhabited 
country. Besides, though these were small and 
tinny-looking, yet soldiers are soldiers wher- 
ever you meet them, and have an air about 
them which makes people feel respectful. 
These two handled their little guns in a most 
businesslike manner. The taller of the two, 
who seemed by his uniform to be a superior 
officer, now stepped forward and snapped out: 
“Give the countersign!” 

The children stood still and stared, Peter 
with his thumb in his mouth. 

“We haven’t got any, sir, so we can’t give it 
to you,” said Ann at last. 

“Silly! He means say it,” whispered Ru- 
dolf in her ear. 

“We can’t say it either,” Ann went on, “be- 
1 17 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

cause we don’t know it. But we know lots of 
other things,” she added, looking pleadingly 
at the officer. “Rudolf, he can say the whole 
of ‘ ’Twas the night before Christmas, and all 
through the house not a creature was stirring, 
not even a mouse’ — and I can say ‘The Gentle 
Cow all Red and White I Love with all my 
Heart’, — and Peter he says ‘I have a Little 
Shadow’, — he knows it all, every word!” 

The little officer turned sharply to his com- 
panion. “Make a note of that, Sergeant,” he 

A 

snorted. “Head it, suspicious information: 
first prisoner, probably dangerous burglar 
burgling on Christmas eve; second prisoner, 
cattle thief; third prisoner — ” 

“But we aren’t anything like that,” broke in 
Rudolf hastily. “You’re entirely mistaken, 
we — ” 

“Say what you are, then,” snapped the of- 
ficer, “and where you have come from and 


CAPTAIN JINKS 

where you are going and what you are going 
to do when you get there; say it, quick!” And 
raising his little gun, the officer pointed it 
straight at Rudolf’s nose. 

“We have come from Catnip Island where 
we were captured by the cat pirates,” began 
Rudolf, stumbling over the words in his ex- 
citement, “and we — we don’t know exactly 
where we are going, and we — we aren’t doing 
exactly anything!” 

“Aha!” The officer turned to his sergeant 
with a triumphant expression. “Just what I 
thought. Anybody that can’t give a better ac- 
count of himself than that had better be locked 
up. Spies — aha! Another of you came ashore 
a while ago — a glib-tongued, story-telling gen- 
tleman who fooled us into letting him off, but 
we’ve got you safe and sound and here you’ll 
stay! Sergeant, arrest these spies!” 

“Certainly, sir,” said the sergeant, making 
•i 19 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


a note of it in his book, “but please, sir, how 
do they be spelled, Captain Jinks, sir?” 

“S-p-i-s-e, spies, of course, idiot!” snapped 
the captain. “Now then, off with ’em. Sep- 
arate cell for each prisoner, bars to the win- 
dows. Heavy chains on this gentleman in par- 
ticeler,” pointing to Rudolf. “Bread and 
water, on a Sunday. Off to the jail with ’em — 
march ’em along!” 

“Beg pardon, sir,” interrupted the sergeant 
who was glad of an excuse to stop at a very 
difficult bit of spelling. “We’ll have to wait a 
bit. I hear the Queen’s band playin’ — ” 

“Then stand at attention and hold yourself 
answerable for the prisoners!” With this com- 
mand, Captain Jinks faced about to the road, 
and stiffened all over till he looked like a lit- 
tle tin statue. For some time the children had 
been hearing the sound of music, at first faint 
and far-away, now growing louder and louder. 


120 


CAPTAIN JINKS 


The sergeant pulled them hastily to the side of 
the road, and bade them in a gruff voice, 
“Keep quiet, or he’d settle ’em!” Then he, 
too, stiffened all over just as Captain Jinks had 
done, and both of them presented arms. The 
head of a procession was coming in sight. 



CHAPTER X 


MEETING A QUEEN 

FIRST came a large company of soldiers al- 
most exactly like Captain Jinks and the ser- 
geant, except that their uniforms were a little 
shabbier-looking, and their arms a little less 
brightly polished. They held themselves 
stiffly and marched very well, in spite of the 
fact that many of them had suffered severe in- 
juries, such as the loss of a leg or an arm at the 
least, in some former campaign, and all of 
them were rather the worse for wear. After 
the soldiers came the band, playing shrilly on 
their tiny instruments, and next, to the chil- 
dren’s delight and astonishment, rolled a num- 
ber of little carriages drawn by mechanical 


MEETING A QUEEN 


horses. Rudolf was so keenly interested in the 
working of these mechanical horses, that he 
hardly noticed the fine ladies who sat stiffly on 
the cushioned seats of the carriages, very 
grandly dressed, and holding beautiful pink 
and blue parasols over their curled heads. 

Suddenly Ann grabbed his arm and whis- 
pered: “Look, look! Did you see them? Ma- 
rie-Louise and Angelina-Elfrida, my own 
dolls, and they never so much as bowed !” 

“Perhaps they didn’t know you,” whispered 
Rudolf. 

“They did, too,” returned his sister angrily. 
“They just laughed and turned their heads the 
other way, horrid things! Just wait, I’ll tell 
them what I think of them; but, oh, Rudolf, 
here come more carriages and more dolls in 
them, and how queerly they are dressed, these 
last, I mean! I never saw any dolls like them 
before. See their poke bonnets, and their 
123 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

fringed mantles, and their little hoop-skirts, 
but, oh, look, look , can that be the Queen?” 

Ann’s voice sounded disappointed as well 
as surprised, and in her excitement she spoke 
so loud that Captain Jinks himself turned his 
threatening eye on her and called out: “Si- 
lence!” But Ann paid no attention to him, nor 
did the other children; the eyes of all three 
were fixed upon a little figure who rode all 
alone at the very end of the procession. They 
knew she must be the Queen by the respectful 
way in which Captain Jinks and the sergeant 
saluted, but she was very different from what 
they had imagined a Queen to be. The wooden 
horse which she rode was not handsome, in- 
deed one of his legs was missing, but he 
pranced and curvetted so proudly upon the re- 
maining three that it seemed as if he knew he 
carried a Queen upon his back. The royal lady 
kept her seat with perfect ease, and when she 
124 


MEETING A QUEEN 


came opposite the children, she checked her 
steed, halted, and gazed down upon them. 

“Have you forgotten me?” she said. Then 
she smiled and they knew her at once. It was 
the corn-cob doll! Though she had grown so 
much larger and seemed so much grander, yet 
she looked just the same as when they had 
taken her out of Aunt Jane’s sandal-wood box 
from which, the children now remembered, 
certain tin soldiers and a three-legged wooden 
horse had also come! TheQueen still wore her 
flowing greeny-yellow gown, her hair was 
braided in two long braids that hung over her 
shoulders, and she carried her quaint little 
head high, in truly royal fashion. 

Now she dismounted gracefully from her 
horse and came toward the children, holding 
out her hand. They dared not look her in the 
face. They were all three ashamed to speak to 
her, and especially Rudolf who remembered 
125 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


only too clearly all the unkind things he had 
said about the corn-cob doll, and how very, 
very near he had come to roasting her over the 
nursery fire! Whatever would happen, 
thought he, if any of her subjects who seemed 
to stand in such awe of her, should find out 
that attempt on their Queen’s life? Captain 
Jinks would probably think imprisonment on 
bread and water entirely too good for him, 
probably it would be slow torture. 

“Answer her majesty,” muttered the cap- 
tain in his ear, “or I’ll have your head cut off!” 

Still Rudolf, blushing fiery red, and not 
knowing what to say, continued to stare down 
at his toes. Peter put his thumb in his mouth, 
Ann hung down her head ; neither of them was 
any better off. 

The little tin captain stepped eagerly for- 
ward. “Shall I give orders to prepare for the 
execution, your Majesty?” he began, in a voice 
126 


MEETING A QUEEN 


full of pleased excitement. “These suspicious 
persons are already under arrest. They would 
furnish very excellent targets for the artillery 
practise? If it should please your Majesty to 
offer a prize for the best shot? Or, if your 
Majesty is in a hurry , now, a nice dip in boil- 
ing oil would finish them off very neatly!” 

“Be quiet, Jinks,” said the Queen frowning. 
“You talk so much I can’t think. If it wasn’t 
for those tiresome revolutions in my capital 
city, I believe I’d banish you. Let me see, how 
many of them have you suppressed for me?” 

“Exactly twelve, your Majesty,” answered 
Jinks with a low bow, “and I beg to announce 
that we are at this moment on the brink of the 
thirteenth — baker’s dozen, your Majesty.” 

“Oh, it’s the baker this time, is it?” asked 
the Queen with a sigh. “What’s the matter 
with him , Jinks?” 

“Same old trouble, your Majesty. Your 
127 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

court, those doll ladies in particular, have be- 
come so haughty — ” 

“Naughty, you mean, Jinks,” corrected the 
Queen. 

“So haughty and naughty, your Majesty, 
that they’ve absolutely refused to eat their 
crusts. Did anybody, I ask your Majesty, ever 
hear the likes of that?” 

There was a moment’s silence. The Queen 
shook her head. The children tried to appear 
at their ease, but they were not. Ann looked 
particularly uncomfortable. She was not fond 
of her crusts. 

“Well, go on, Jinks, what else?” said the 
Queen. 

“Well, your Majesty, this keeps the baker 
busy day and night baking ’em bread, not to 
speak of the cakes and pies, and he says he 
feels he hadn’t orter stand it any longer. He’s 
going to strike. As for the populace, your 
128 


MEETING A QUEEN 

Majesty, they only get the stale loaves or none 
at all, and they’re wild, your Majesty, very 
wild indeed.” 

“I suppose they are, Jinks,” sighed the 
Queen. 

“And the worst of it is, your Majesty, we’re 
very short of soldiers. The Commander-in- 
Chief” — both Jinks and the sergeant drew 
themselves up and saluted at the name — “has 
taken a whole company to the seaboard for to 
repel the cat pirates, and very fierce them pi- 
rates are, I’ve heard tell. We may have to send 
him reinforcements at any time.” 

“The Commander-in-Chief, Jinks,” said the 
Queen haughtily, “is a great general. He will 
manage the pirates and the baker, too, if you 
can’t do it. And if the worst should come to 
the worst before he gets back, why I’ll just ab- 
dicate, that’s all, and the baker can be king 
and much good may it do him.” She turned to 
129 


(THE WONDERFUL BED 

the children and smiled at them. “Now,” she 
said, “you shall come with me and I will show 
you where I used to live before I was a 
Queen.” 

The corn-cob doll waved her hand, gave an 
order, and immediately the carriage in which 
sat Marie-Louise and Angelina-Elfrida was 
turned and driven back to where the children 
stood. 

“These ladies will enjoy a walk,” said the 
Queen. 

Very sulkily the two elegant doll-ladies got 
out of their carriage, not daring to disobey, 
and passed by Ann, noses in the air, without so 
much as a nod. 

“Never mind them, dears,” said the Queen 
kindly. “They don’t know any better. Now 
jump in!” 

The children obeyed, hardly able to believe 
in their good luck, and in another moment, 
130 


MEETING A QUEEN 

much to the surprise and indignation of Cap- 
tain Jinks, they were rolling away from him, 
the Queen riding close beside their carriage. 

“You are safe now,” said she, “at least until 
the revolution begins. If Jinks should fire his 
cannon, that’s a sign it’s starting, but don’t 
worry” — as she saw that the children were 
looking rather alarmed — “I dare say it will 
blow over without a battle. And now I want 
you to look about you, for I don’t think you 
have ever seen anything like this before.” 

They had not indeed, and as their shy- 
ness wore off, the children began to ask 
the Queen a great many questions. Was 
this her capital city they were coming to? 
Were those the stores where all the dolls’ 
clothes in the world came from? Was it real 
water in the little fountain playing in the mid- 
dle of the square? All this time they were be- 
ing carried swiftly through the streets of the 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

neatest, prettiest, little, toy town any one could 
wish to see. Both sides of the main street were 
lined with little shops, and as the children 
leaned out of the carriage for a brief glimpse 
into their glittering windows, they saw sights 
that made them long to stop and look more 
closely. 

There were clothing shops, shoe shops, 
candy shops, a very grand-looking milli- 
ner’s establishment where the children were 
amused to catch a glimpse of Angelina-El- 
frida and Marie-Louise trying on hats, and a 
gaily decorated doll theater where a crowd of 
dolls were pushing their way in to see a Punch 
and Judy show. There were markets where 
busy customers thronged to buy all sorts and 
kinds of doll eatables, turkeys and chickens the 
size of sparrows and humming-birds, yellow 
pumpkins as big as walnuts, red-cheeked ap- 
ples like cranberries, cabbages fully as large 
132 


MEETING A QUEEN 

as the end of your thumb, and freshly baked 
pies as big around as a penny. 

Peter’s eyes nearly popped out of his head 
as he passed all these good things without hope 
of sampling any of them! The last shop they 
passed was that of the royal baker, and they 
noticed that its windows were boarded up, 
while a crowd of common dolls stood about in 
front of the door, muttering angrily. 

But now the business part of the town was 
left behind, and the children were being 
driven through street after street of gaily 
painted, neatly built, little houses with gardens 
full of tiny bright-colored flowers, stables, 
garages — everything complete that the heart 
of the most exacting doll in the world could 
desire. Ann and Peter were quite wild about 
it all, and even Rudolf condescended to ad- 
mire. Now the houses were left behind and 
they entered a little park, where tiny artificial 


133 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


lakes glittered and stiff little trees were set 
about on the bright green grass. In the center 
of this park stood the doll palace. It was 
pure white, finished in gold, and had real glass 
windows in it, and white marble steps leading 
up to it, and high gilded gates where a guard 
of soldiers turned out to present arms, and a 
band was beginning to play. The rest of the 
procession turned in at the gates of the palace, 
but rather to the children’s disappointment, 
the Queen gave their coachman orders to drive 
on. 

“You may see my palace afterward, if we 
have time,” she said, “but I want to take you 
first of all to see my dear old home where I 
used to live when I was a girl, when the lit- 
tle mother took care of me.” 

The children looked at one another. Then 
Peter said boldly: “Was that when you were 
134 


MEETING A QUEEN 

Aunt Jane’s doll? You weren’t a Queen then, 
were you?” 

“No, indeed,” answered her majesty, smil- 
ing. “I was just an ugly little doll, the happi- 
est, best-loved little doll in all the world, and 
with the dearest little mother. But here we 
are, and you shall see for yourself what a snug 
home I had.” 

The old doll house looked neat enough from 
the outside, to be sure, but I am afraid if the 
children had run across it in the attic at Aunt 
Jane’s they would have taken it for a couple 
of large packing-boxes set one upon the other. 
Once inside, however, they forgot how impa- 
tient they had been to see the palace and its 
gorgeous furnishings, they were so interested 
and amused by the homely furnishings and 
neat little arrangements so proudly displayed 
to them by the Corn-cob Queen. 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


She led the children through one room 
after another, explaining each thing as 
they passed it. Those little muslin cur- 
tains at the windows, the little mother 
had hemmed them all herself. It was 
she who had made that wonderful cradle 
out of cardboard, with sheets from a pair of 
grandfather’s old pocket-handkerchiefs, she 
who had pieced that tiniest of tiny patchwork 
quilts! In the kitchen that neat set of pots and 
pans made from acorns and the shells of wal- 
nuts was the work of her hands, assisted, per- 
haps, by the penknife of a certain little boy. 
That blue and white tea-set on the pantry 
shelves — the children recognized it at once as 
having come out of the sandal-wood box — 
why it was almost worn out from the number 
of cups of tea the old doll and her little mother 
had taken together in the good old days! 

“It’s just the dearest little house in the 
136 


MEETING A QUEEN 


world,” sighed Ann, when, after having seen 
and admired everything to their heart’s con- 
tent, they took their places in the carriage 
again, “and we don’t wonder you love it! The 
things that come straight from the toy shops 
are not really half so nice as the things you fix 
yourself — we understand now. But I sup- 
pose,” she added thoughtfully, “you find it 
much grander being a Queen?” 

“Grander, perhaps,” sighed the corn-cob 
doll, “but a great deal more of a nuisance. 
However — ” 

Just then the pop of a toy cannon inter- 
rupted the Queen’s speech. They had driven 
back almost to the palace, and could see a 
crowd of common dolls of all kinds and sizes 
gathering on the green in front of the gilded 
gates. At the same moment a troop of soldiers, 
headed by the little tin captain, came running 
from the direction of the town evidently with 
137 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

the intention of putting a stop to the disturb- 
ance. 

“The revolution,” said the Queen calmly, 
“just as I expected. Now I am afraid I shall 
have to send you out of town.” 

“But why?” Rudolf began in his arguing 
voice. “We don’t want to go. We want to stay 
and fight on your side, and I’m sure we’d be 
very useful! Why I’d just as lief command 
your army as not, and — ” 

“Thank you very much,” said the Corn-cob 
Queen, “but what would Captain Jinks say to 
that? He is in command, you know. And if 
he should fail me, why the Commander-in- 
Chief will soon be back from capturing the cat 
pirates.” 

“Who is this fellow you call the Command- 
er-in-Chief, anyway?” Rudolf interrupted 
crossly. 

The Queen looked him straight in the eye. 

138 


MEETING A QUEEN 


“I hope,” she said, “that you may all be al- 
lowed to see him some day, if you are good. 
He is a great soldier. He never sulks, and al- 
ways obeys without asking questions. That is 
more than some little boys do.” Rudolf hung 
his head, and the Queen added hastily: “But 
now I see that Captain Jinks and the baker are 
going to hold a conference. I must go and 
join them. Your coachman will drive you out 
of town the back way. Now where would you 
like to go?” 

“Back to our Aunt Jane, please,” said Ann 
quickly. “Can you tell us the way?” 

“No,” said the Queen, “I mustn’t, but I have 
a friend who is a dream-keeper just over the 
border, and I think he may be able to help you. 
I’ll tell the coachman to drive you there. Now 
good-by!” 

“Good-by, good-by!” called the children. 
The coachman touched up the horses, they 
139 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


were whirled away in a cloud of dust through 
which they looked back regretfully at the 
queenly figure on the little wooden horse who 
waved her hand again and again in kindly 
farewell. They saw her joined by Captain 
Jinks and by a stout person in a white cap and 
apron who handed the Queen what seemed to 
be some kind of document printed upon a 
large sheet of pie crust. 

“That was the Baker, I guess,” said Rudolf, 
“and I dare say what he was handing her was 
the declaration of war! Oh, what a shame it 
is we are going to miss all the fun!” 

“And the refreshments,” sighed Peter. “We 
always do! I never did taste a declarashun of 
war, but it looked awful good. The very next 
time I see one, I’m going to — ” 

But what Peter was going to do Ann and 
Rudolf did not hear, for at that moment they 
were all three nearly spilled out of the little 
140 


MEETING A QUEEN 


carriage by the furious rate at which their 
driver turned a corner. They had left the 
dolls’ city far behind them and were out on the 
long brown road that led past the little tent 
where the children had been arrested by Jinks 
and the sergeant. Now they were out 
in the open country hurrying past the won- 
derful bright-colored plains, past fields of 
pink and purple, blue and green and yel- 
low, white and scarlet, faster and faster 
all the time, the horses rushing along with 
such curious irregular jerks and bounds that it 
was almost impossible for the children to keep 
their seats, and they expected at each moment 
to be dumped in the middle of the road. 

“Look out!” shouted Rudolf to the coach- 
man. “Don’t you see you are going to upset 
us?” 

The coachman was a very grand-looking 
person in a white and gold livery. He never 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

even turned his powdered head as he shouted 
back: 

“Didn’t have no — or-ders — not — to!” And 
for some time they tore on faster than ever. 

At last Ann leaned forward and caught hold 
of one of the coachman’s little gold-embroid- 
ered coat tails. “Oh, do take care,” she cried, 
“you might run somebody down!” 

“That’s it,” — the coachman’s voice sounded 
faint and jerky, and the children could hardly 
catch the words that floated back to them: 
“Running — down — run-ing — down ! As — fast 
— as — ev-er — I — can. Most — com-pli-cated — * 
insides — in — all — the — king-dom. Can’t — be 
— wound — up — not — by — likes — of — you — ” 

The horses were no longer galloping, now 
they were slowing up, now they stopped, but 
with such a sudden jerk that all three children 
were tumbled out into the road. They had 
been expecting this to happen for so long that 


142 


MEETING A QUEEN 


the thing was not such a shock after all, and 
somehow they landed without being hurt in 
the slightest. They picked themselves up, and 
saw the little carriage standing at the side of 
the road, the horses perfectly motionless, each 
with a forefoot raised in the air, the coach- 
man stiff and still upon his box, gazing 
straight in front of him. 

“He’ll stay like that,” said Peter mourn- 
fully, rubbing the dust from his knees,, “till 
he’s wound up again. I wish we had the key!” 

“I wish we did,” said Rudolf crossly. “You 
know what Betsy says about — Tf wishes were 
horses, beggars could ride’ — well, they aren’t, 
so we’ve got to walk now. I wonder where 
we are?” 

Looking around them, the children saw that 
they had come to the very last of the many col- 
ored fields, where the brown road ended in a 
stretch of creamy-yellow grass. Just beyond a 
143 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


thick woods began, but was divided from the 
creamy field by a broad bright strip of color, 
like a long flower bed planted with flowers of 
all kinds and colors set in all sorts of different 
patterns — stars, triangles, diamonds, and 
squares. 

“That’s the border,” shouted Ann, “and over 
there somewhere we’ll find the person the 
Queen said would help us get back to Aunt 
Jane. Come on!” As she spoke she bounded 
off across the field, the two boys after her, and 
in less time than it takes to tell it they had run 
through the tall yellow grass, jumped the bor- 
der, and stood upon the edge of the wood. 



CHAPTER XI 


THE GOOD DREAMS 

A THIN screen of bushes was all that hid 
from the children’s eyes the people whose 
voices they could hear so plainly. 

“Maybe it’s some kind of picnic they’re 
having in there,” cried Peter, pushing eagerly 
forward. “Come on quick!” 

“No, you don’t, either,” whispered Ru- 
dolf, catching him and holding him back. 
“Don’t let’s get caught this time, let’s peep 
through first and see w T hat the people are like.” 

“Yes, do let’s be careful,” pleaded Ann. 
“We don’t want to get arrested again, it’s not 
a bit nice — though I suppose if this is where 
the Queen’s friend lives, it isn’t likely any- 
thing so horrid will happen to us.” 

H5 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

“Do stop talking, Ann, and listen. Who- 
ever they are in there, they are making so 
much noise they can’t possibly hear me, so I’m 
going to creep into those bushes and see what 
I can see.” 

As he spoke Ruldolf carefully parted 
the bushes at a spot where they were 
thin and peeped between the leaves, Ann and 
Peter crowding each other to see over his 
shoulder. They looked into a kind of open 
glade not much larger than a good-sized room 
and walled on all sides by tall trees and thick 
underbrush. It had a flooring of soft green 
turf, and about in the middle lay a great rock 
as large as a playhouse. This rock was all cov- 
ered over with moss and lichens, and the 
strange thing about it was that a neat door had 
been cut in its side. Before this door, talking 
and waving his hands to the crowd that 
thronged about him, stood a man — the queer- 
146 


THE GOOD DREAMS 


est little man the children had ever seen! He 
looked like a collection of stout sacks stuffed 
very tightly and tied firmly at the necks. One 
sack made his head, another larger one his 
body, four more his arms and legs. His broad 
face, though rather dull, wore a good-hu- 
mored expression, and he smiled as he looked 
about him. 

A pile of empty sacking-bags lay on 
the ground beside him, and from time to 
time he caught up one of these, ran his eye 
over the crowd, chose one of them, and 
popped him, or it, as it happened to be, into 
the sack which he then swung on his shoulder 
and heaved into the open doorway in the big 
rock, where it disappeared from sight. He 
would then taken another sack and make a 
fresh selection, looking about him all the 
while with sleepy good humor, and paying 
little if any attention to the cries, questions, 
147 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


and complaints with which he was attacked 
on all sides. 

What a funny lot they were — this crowd 
that surrounded the little man! The children 
could hardly smother their excitement at the 
sight of them. Not people or animals only 
were they, but all kinds of odd objects also, 
such as no one could expect to see running 
about loose. A Birthday Cake was there, with 
lighted candles; a little pile of neatly darned 
socks and stockings, a white-cotton Easter 
Rabbit with pink pasteboard ears, a Jolly 
Santa Claus, a smoking hot Dinner, a Nice 
Nurse who rocked a smiling baby, a brown- 
faced grinning Organ-Man, his organ 
strapped before him, his Monkey on his 
shoulder. There were too many by far for the 
children to take in all at once, but at the sight 
of one particular member of the crowd, the 
children gasped with astonishment; and 
148 


THE GOOD DREAMS 


Peter’s excitement nearly betrayed them. 
There, lounging by the side of a mild-faced 
School-Mistress Person, still smoking his 
chocolate cigarette, was — the False Hare! 

“Look alive now!” the little man was cry- 
ing out. “Who’s next, who’s next?” 

“Me, me, me — take me next, Sandy!” A 
dozen little voices cried this at one and the 
same time. There was a scramble, bursts of 
laughter, followed by a sharp rebuke from 
Sandy. “No, you don’t either. Stand back, 
you small fry. No shoving!” 

When Peter had seen and recognized the 
False Hare he had been so excited that it had 
been almost impossible for Rudolf and Ann 
to keep him quiet. Now, as he watched the 
scramble and the rush and the fuss the funny 
crowd was making about the little man, he 
laughed out so loud that it was too late even 
to pinch him. The children’s presence was 
149 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


discovered, and two, tall, silver candlesticks 
jumped from a satin-lined box and ran to 
draw them into the middle of the glade. 
Sandy, as the little man appeared to be called, 
paused in his business, turned round, and 
smiled at the children. 

“Now then,” said he, “what are you doing 
here? Don’t you know this is my busy night? 
Who are you, anyway? Not on my list, I’ll 
warrant. Who’s dreams are you?” 

“Nobody’s,” began Rudolf. “The Corn- 
cob Queen sent us to see if you could tell us 
any way to get back to our Aunt Jane — ” 
“Nobody’s?” interrupted the little man. 
“Did you say you were Nobody’s dreams? 
Don’t see him in the N’s.” And he took a 
printed list out of his pocket and ran his eye 
anxiously over it. “Are you sure — ” 

“Please, he means we’re not dreams,” said 
Ann, stepping forward, “at least we don’t 


THE GOOD DREAMS 

think so.” She hesitated a second and then 
added : “It depends on what happens to them. 
Are these all dreams?” 

“All perfectly Good Dreams, or my name’s 
not Sandman,” answered the baggy fellow 
briskly. “We don’t handle the Bad Ones here, 
not us!” 

Peter looked interested. “Where does the 
Bad Ones live?” he asked. “I wants to see 
them.” 

The Sandman shook his head at Peter. 
“Oh, no, you don’t, little boy,” he said. “No, 
you don’t! Don’t you go meddling in their 
direction or you’ll get into trouble, take my 
word for it. They live way off in the woods 
and they’re a bad lot. They’ve got a worse 
boss than old Sandy! No, no; — the good kind 
are trouble enough for me. What with the 
hurry and the flurry and the general mix-up, 
something a little off color will slip in now 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


and then. Everybody makes mistakes some- 
times!” 

As he made this last remark Sandy cast a 
doubtful look at the False Hare, who grinned 
and tipped his silk hat to him. 

“I told Sandy all about myself,” said the 
False Hare, winking at the children. “I told 
him I was just as good as I could be!” 

The children could not help laughing. 
“I’m afraid you don’t know him as well as we 
do, Mr. Sandy,” said Ann. 

“Oh, I know about as much as I want to 
know about him,” said Sandy, pretending to 
frown very fiercely. “I’ve almost made up my 
mind to get rid of him, but the truth is I don’t 
really know just where he belongs.” 

“Doesn’t matter to me whether I spend the 
night with a bald-headed old gentleman or a 
bird-dog — all the same to me” said the False 
Hare meekly. This speech sounded so like 
152 


THE GOOD DREAMS 

him that the children looked at one another 
and burst out laughing again, at which the 
False Hare gave a kind of solemn wink, 
sighed, and touched his eyes with a little 
paper handkerchief he held gracefully in one 
paw. 

The Sandman turned his back on the silly 
fellow, and went on with his explanations to 
the children: “We have a very select set of 
customers,’’ he said, “and it’s our aim to sup- 
ply ’em with the finest line of goods on the 
market. Wears me to a frazzle sometimes, 
this business does,” he stopped to wipe from 
his brow a tiny stream of sand that was trick- 
ling down it, “but I’ve got to keep at it! All 
the folks, big and little, like Good Dreams, 
and want ’em every night, and if they get 
mixed up or the quality’s inferior, or there’s 
not enough to go around, I tell you what, it 
makes trouble for Sandy! But just step a 
153 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


little nearer, and you shall see for yourselves 
how the whole thing is managed.” 

The children followed Sandy, who walked 
back to the pile of empty sacks, picked one up, 
compared the label on it with a name on his 
list, and called out in a loud voice: “Mrs. 
Patrick O’Flynn, Wash Lady — excellent char- 
acter — never misses on a Monday — six chil- 
dren — husband not altogether satisfactory. 
Here, now, Noddy — Blink! I’ll want some 
help, boys.” 

As he called out these two names, two 
very fat, sleepy boys, looking like pillows 
with strings tied round their waists, slouched 
from behind the rock where they had been 
waiting, and stood sulkily at attention. There 
was a scramble and a rush and a fuss among 
the Good Dreams, just as there had been be- 
fore when the children first peeped into the 
glade, each one struggling and pushing and 
154 


THE GOOD DREAMS 


crowding to get ahead of the next, without any 
regard as to whether or not it was wanted. It 
took a tremendous effort on the part of Sandy, 
together with all the help the sleepy sulky 
boys would give, to get the right collection of 
dreams into the Wash Lady’s sack, and to keep 
the wrong ones out. 

k “Letter from the Old Country,” Sandy 
cried. “That’s it, boys, more lively there. 
Tell that Pound of Tea to step up — No, no 
pink silk stockings to-day, thank you. Tell 
that Landlord the rent’s paid, I’ll let him 
know when he’s wanted. Hand over that pile 
of mended clothing — and the pay envelope, 
mind it’s the right amount — all the rest of 
you, step aside!” Waving away a gay bonnet 
with a bird on it, a bottle marked “Patent 
Medicine,” and the persistent pink stockings, 
the Sandman closed the mouth of Mrs. 
O’Flynn’s sack, and swung it on his shoulder, 
155 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

nodding to the children to watch what would 
happen. Much excited, they crowded round 
the open door in the side of the big rock and 
peered down into what seemed to be a kind of 
dark well with a toboggan-slide descending 
into it. Sandy placed the Wash Lady’s sack 
at the top of the slide, and before the children 
could so much as wink, it had slid off into the 
darkness and disappeared from sight. 

“Oh, my!” cried Ann, “Is it a shoot-the- 
chutes? Does it bump when it gets there?” 

“No, no,” said the Sandman. “No bumps 
whatsoever, the most comfortable kind of 
traveling I know, in fact you’re there the same 
time you start, and I’d like to know how you 
can beat that? I ought to know, for I use this 
route myself on my rounds a little earlier in 
the evening.” He walked back to his pile of 
sacks, and picked up another of them. “Now 
156 


THE GOOD DREAMS 


then,” said he, examining the label, “who’s 
next? Aha — Miss Jane Mackenzie!” 

The children could hardly believe their 
ears. “Oh, Ruddy,” whispered Ann in Ru- 
dolf’s ear, “what kind of dreams do you sup- 
pose Aunt Jane will get?” 

“Sh! Listen, he’s going to tell us,” an- 
swered Rudolf. 

The Sandman was gravely consulting his 
list. “M-hm* — Cook-that-likes-living-in-the- 

Country! Step this way, ma’am, and don’t 
take any more room than you can help. New 
Non-fadable Cheap but Elegant Parlor Cur- 
tains — One Able-bodied Intelligent Garden- 
er, with a Generous Disposition — hurry the 
gentleman forward, boys, he’s a curiosity! 
iWhat’s next? Aha! One niece, two nephews 
— three perfectly good children.” Sandy 
paused, stared about him at the} throng of 
157 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


jumping, pushing dreams — then added: 
“Don’t see ’em.” 

“Why, yes you do!” Ann was pulling im- 
patiently at the Sandman’s sleeve — “Here you 
are.” Then she truned to Rudolf and whis- 
pered excitedly: “Don’t you see? We must 
make the Sandman believe we are Aunt Jane’s 
Good Dreams, and then he’ll send us back to 
her.” 

“I’d like a ride on that slide, all right!” re- 
turned Rudolf. 

“But I doesn’t want to go back to Aunt Jane 
yet,” came the voice of Peter clearly from be- 
hind them. “I shan’t go till I’ve seen the Bad 
Dreams.” 

“Nonsense!” Rudolf turned round on him 
angrily. “Of course you’ll go. You’re the 
youngest, and you’ve got to mind us.” And 
then without paying any more attention to 

158 


THE GOOD DREAMS 


Peter, Rudolf thrust himself in front of the 
Sandman. “Here we are,” he said. “We’re 
all ready.” 

The Sandman looked the boy up and down, 
consulted his list again, smiled and shook his 
head very doubtfully. 

“I’m sorry,” he said, “but I’m afraid you 
don’t exactly answer. Just listen to this.” 
And he read aloud: “Number one. Boy: 
polite and gentlemanly in manner — brown 
hair neatly smoothed and parted — Eton suit, 
clean white collar, boots well polished — Latin 
grammar under arm — ” 

He stopped. Rudolf, in his pajamas, 
with his ruffled locks, tin sword, and angry 
expression, did not answer very closely to this 
description. The Cook-who-liked-living-in- 
the-Country, the Gardener-with-the-Gener- 
ous-Disposition, and several other Good 
159 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


Dreams burst out laughing. Only the False 
Hare kept a solemn expression, but Rudolf 
knew very well what that meant. 

The Sandman continued: “Number two. 
Little girl: modest and timid in her manners, 
not apt to address her elders until spoken to — 
hair braided neatly and tied with blue ribbon 
— white apron over dark dress — doing patch- 
work with a pleased expression. Has not for- 
gotten thimble — ” 

Here Sandy was interrupted by the Cook 
and the Gardener, who declared that if he 
didn’t stop they’d die a-laughin’, that they 
would! The False Hare wiped away a tear, 
and none of the dreams seemed to consider 
the description correct. Sandy shook his head 
again, as he glanced at Ann in her nighty, her 
ruffled curls tumbling over her flushed face 
— Ann without patchwork, thimble, or pleased 
expression! 

160 


THE GOOD DREAMS 


“Afraid you won’t do, miss,” said he, look- 
ing quite sorry for her. “Let’s see what’s next. 
Number three” — he read — “Very small boy: 
clean blue sailor suit — white socks — looks 
sorry for — ” 

All turned to look at Peter, but Peter was 
not looking sorry for anything — Peter was not 
there! Ann gave a hasty look all round the 
glade, then burst into tears. 

“Oh, Rudolf,” she cried, “what shall we 
do? He’s gone — he’s slipped away to find 
those Bad Dreams all by himself — you know 
how Peter is, when he says he’s going to do 
anything, he will do it. Oh, oh, I ought to 
have watched him !” 

“Don’t cry,” said Rudolf hastily. “It’s 
just as much my fault. You stay here and I’ll 
go fetch him back. I have my sword, you 
know.” 

“No, no,” sobbed Ann. “Don’t leave me. 

161 


.THE WONDERFUL BED 

It was my fault — I promised mother I would 
always look after Peter. We’ll go together. 
The Sandman will tell us where the Bad 
Dreams live, won’t you?” she added, turning 
to Sandy. 

“There, there, of course I will,” said the 
little man kindly. “I’d go along with you, if 
there wasn’t such a press of business just now, 
but you can see for yourselves what a mess 
things would be in if I should leave. You 
must go right ahead, right into the thick of the 
woods. Follow that path on the other side of 
the glade. You needn’t be afraid you’ll miss 
those Bad Ones — they’ll be on the lookout for 
you, I’m afraid.” 

The children thanked Sandy for all his 
kindness, and turned to leave him. “One mo- 
ment,” he cried, and he ran ahead of them to 
draw aside the wall of prickly bushes and 
show them the little path he had spoken of 
162 


THE GOOD DREAMS 


which wound from the Good Dreams’ glade 
toward the heart of the wood. 

“Keep right on,” said Sandy, “and don’t be 
afraid. Remember — they’re a queer lot, those 
fellows, but they can’t hurt you if you are 
careful. Don’t answer ’em back and don’t ask 
’em too many questions. One thing in partic- 
ular — if they offer you anything to eat, don’t 
taste a mouthful of it. If you do it’ll be the 
worse for you!” 

Rudolf and Ann thought of Peter and his 
passion for “refreshments”, and they started 
hastily forward. 

“Just one thing more,” called Sandy after 
them. “About that consignment of your 

!r- 

aunt’s, you know! I’ll hold that over till you 
get back, and we’ll see what can be done. 
Maybe we can fit you in yet, somehow. Now 
good-by, and good luck to you!” 

“Good-by, and thank you!” Rudolf and 
1163 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


Ann called back to him, and then they plunged 
into the path. The wall of bushes sprang back 
again behind them, and cut them off from the 
shelter of the Good Dreams’ glade. As the 
path was very narrow, Rudolf walked first, 
sword drawn, and Ann trotted behind him, 
trying not to think of what queer things might 
be waiting behind the trees to jump out at 
them, trying only to think of her naughty 
Peter, and how glad she would be to see him 
again. 




CHAPTER XII 


ENTER THE KNIGHT-MARE 

At first it was easy enough for the children 
to follow the narrow winding path which the 
Sandman had pointed out, but soon they came 
to a part of the wood where the underbrush 
grew thicker and their path lost itself in a net- 
work of other little paths spread out as if on 
purpose to confuse them. Rudolf and Ann 
hurried along as fast as they could go, but it 
was hard work to make their way through 
the tangled undergrowth where the twisted 
roots set traps for their feet — and caught them, 
too, sometimes — while overhead the tall trees 
met and mingled their branches. From these 
hung down great masses of trailing vines and 
spreading creepers like long, lean, hairy arms 
165 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

stretched out to bar their way. Rudolf had 
to stop now and then to hack at these arms 
with his sword before he and Ann could pass 
through. Worst of all — the thick growth of 
trees made the wood so dark that they could 
not see more than a few feet ahead of them. 

“Oh, Ruddy, I’m sure we’re not on the 
right path any more,” said Ann at last. “Peter 
is so little — he never, never could have pushed 
his way through here!” 

“N-no,” admitted Rudolf. “Perhaps he 
couldn’t, but maybe he stuck to the right path, 
Ann, and if he did he’s there by this time.” 

“But I don’t want him to get there!” poor 
Ann cried. “That would be much worse for 
him than being lost. If he’s just around the 
wood somewhere we can find him and bring 
him back and then coax Sandy to send us all 
home by the toboggan-slide to Aunt Jane, but 
if he’s found the Bad Dreams or they’ve found 
1 66 


ENTER THE KNIGHT-MARE 


him — Oh, Ruddy, how do we know what 
awful things they may be doing to him 1” 
“Don’t be a goose, Ann,” said Rudolf 
stoutly, though he was really beginning to feel 
worried himself. “You know they are only 
dreams if they are bad. What can a dream 
do, anyway? They’re not real.” 

“Oh, they’re real enough,” sighed little 
Ann. “Sometimes the things in dreams are 
real-er than real things. I’m ’fraid enough 
of real cows, but they can’t walk up-stairs like 
the dream cows can — and, oh, I remember the 
dream I dreamed about the Dentist-man, after 
I had my tooth pulled, the one father gave 
me the dollar for — and — ” 

“Bother!” said Rudolf. “I’ve had lots 
worse dreams than cows and dentists. P’lice- 
men and Indian chiefs, and — oh, heaps of 
things, and I didn’t really mind ’em, either, 
but then I’m braver than — ” 

167 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“Sh!” interrupted Ann, stopping and catch- 
ing at Rudolf’s arm. “I hear something — 
something queer. Listen !” 

Rudolf listened. “I don’t hear anything,” 
he said at last. “What was it like?” 

“Oh, such a creepy, crawly sound, and — 
Oh, Ruddy — there is a face — see it? A hor- 
rid little face peeping out at us from behind 
that tree!” 

Rudolf saw the face too, a winking, blink- 
ing, leering, little face much like the one that 
had grinned at Ann from the post of the big 
bed not so very long ago. 

All at once as the children looked about 
them, they began to see faces every- 
where, faces in the crotches of the trees, 
faces where the branches crossed high 
above their heads, faces even in the under- 
growth about their feet. It reminded Ru- 
dolf of the puzzle pictures he and Ann were 
168 



<cc 


yy 


I hear something — something queer. 















L/ 





























































ENTER THE KNIGHT-MARE 


so fond of studying where you have to look and 
look before you can find the hidden people, 
but when once you have found them you 
wonder how you could have been so stupid 
as not to have spied them long before. He 
heard distinctly now the noises Ann had 
heard. It was as if the hidden places of the 
wood were full of small live things which 
were gathering together and coming toward 
the children from every direction, closing 
them in on every side. Then somebody 
laughed in a high cracked voice just behind 
them, one of Ann’s curls was sharply pulled, 
and Rudolf’s precious sword was plucked 
from his hand and tossed upon the ground. 
Still they could see no bodies to which the 
little faces could belong, and they began to 
feel very queer indeed. 

Then came the laugh again, repeated a 
number of times and coming now from di- 
169 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


rectly over their heads where the branches 
of a great beech tree swept almost to 
the ground. Rudolf and Ann looked up 
just in time to catch sight of the queer little 
creatures who were looking down at them 
from between the beech leaves. It was no 
wonder they had been so hard to see, for they 
were dressed in tight-fitting suits of fur ex- 
actly the color of the bark, and had small 
pointed fur hoods upon their heads which 
made them look very much like squirrels. 
Even now that the children had spied them 
out, it was impossible to examine them closely 
for they were never quiet, never in the same 
place more than an instant, but swung them- 
selves restlessly from bough to bough, then to 
the ground and back again in two jumps, 
peeping, peering, racing each other along the 
branches, all the time without the slightest 
noise other than was made by their light feet 


ENTER THE KNIGHT-MARE 


among the leaves and the two laughs the chil- 
dren had heard. 

Rudolf picked up his sword, and said in 
as bold a voice as he could manage — “Please, 
could any of you tell us the right path to — ” 

A burst of sharp squeals, shrill laughs, and 
jeering remarks interrupted his question. The 
whole company of queer creatures dropped to 
the ground at the same time, and instantly 
formed a circle about the children, snapping 
their little white teeth, and grinning and chat- 
tering like monkeys. 

“Are you the Bad Dreams?” asked Ru- 
dolf. Then, as a burst of laughter contra- 
dicted this idea — “Who are you, then?” 

“Who are we? Who are we?” mocked the 
creatures. “O-ho, hear the human! Doesn’t 
know us — never got scolded on our account, 
did he, did he? Oh, no; oh, no! Bite him, 
snatch him, scratch him! Catch him!” 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


Closer and closer the horrid little things 
pressed about the two children. “What do 
you mean, anyway?” cried Rudolf, keeping 
them back with his foot as best he could. 
“Who are you? You’re squirrels — that’s all 
you are!” 

“Squirrels!” The leader of the little 
wretches seemed furious at the idea. “No, 
no,” he screamed, making a dash at Rudolf’s 
leg with his sharp teeth. “We’re Fidgets, 
Fidgets, Fidgets! Don’t you know the 
Fidgets when you see ’em, you great blunder- 
ing human, you? An old, old family, that’s 
what we are. Guess Methuselah had the 
Fidgets sometimes, guess he did, did, did!” 
With every one of the last three words he 
made a snatch at Rudolf, trying his best to 
bite him, and at the same time dodging clev- 
erly the blows Rudolf was now dealing on all 
sides with his sword. 


172 


ENTER THE KNIGHT-MARE 


Ann had picked up a little stick and was 
doing her best to help Rudolf in his battle. 
“I know you,” she cried, turning angrily on 
the Fidgets, “you horrid little things! I’ve 
had you often, in school just before it’s out, 
and in church, and when mother takes me out 
to make calls — you’ve disgraced her often — ” 
Then she stopped, really afraid of saying too 
much. The Fidgets, with a wild squeal, now 
began a mad sort of dance round and round 
the two children, giving them now a nip, now 
a pinch, now a sharp pull till they were dizzy 
and frightened and weary of trying to defend 
themselves against such unequal numbers. 

All at once, above the shrill cries of their 
enemies, the children heard a new sound, a 
crackling rustling noise in the bushes as if 
some large creature was making its way 
through the wood. The Fidgets heard it, too, 
and in a twinkling they had hushed their 
173 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


shrill voices, broken their circle, and com- 
pletely hidden themselves from sight. It was 
all so sudden that Rudolf and Ann had no 
time to run, but stood perfectly still, gazing 
at the bushes just in front of them from which 
the noises came. 

As they looked the bushes were parted, 
and a long lean head poked itself through, 
a large black head with a white streak 
down its nose, and two great mournful 
eyes that stared into theirs. Ann gave a little 
scream and shrank closer to Rudolf. The 
creature opened a wide mouth that showed 
enormous, ugly, yellow teeth, and said in a 
rough but not unfriendly voice: “Hullo! 
Oats-and-Broadswords — if it’s not a couple of 
lost colts! Where’d you come from, young- 
sters?” 

Without waiting for them to answer, it 
crashed through the bushes and stood before 
174 


ENTER THE KNIGHT-MARE 


them, a curious sight, indeed the strangest 
they had yet seen in the course of their ad- 
ventures. What they had thought was a horse 
from the sight of its head, was a horse no far- 
ther down than the shoulders, all the rest of 
him was a Knight, a splendid knight in full 
armor of shining steel. He was without 
weapon of any kind, and even while the chil- 
dren shrank from the sight of his big ugly 
head with its sad eyes and long yellow teeth, 
they saw that this was not a creature to be 
much afraid of. 

1 “Well, I scared ’em away, didn’t I?” he 
asked triumphaatly, and then, hanging his 
head a little, he added in rather a humble 
tone, “It’s pretty poor sport hunting Fidgets, 
I know, but it’s about all I can get nowadays. 
Hope they didn’t hurt you?” he added po- 
litely. 

“Not a bit,” said Rudolf, “but I’m sure 

*75 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


I’m glad you came along when you did, for 
I don’t know how we ever would have got 
rid of the beastly little things. Only when we 
first saw you, we thought — ” 

“Oh, I know,” interrupted the stranger 
hastily — “you thought it was something worse. 
That’s it, that’s just my luck! I’m the gentlest 
creature in the world and everybody’s afraid 
of me. My business,” he explained, turning 
to Ann, “is to redress wrongs and to see after 
the ladies, but — bless you — they won’t let me 
get near enough to do anything for ’em!” A 
great tear rolled down his long nose as he 
spoke, and he looked so silly that Ann and 
Rudolf could hardly help laughing at him, 
though they did not in the least want to be 
rude. 

“And then,” continued the creature, sob- 
bing, “I’m so divided in my feelings. If I 
were only all Knight, now, or even all Mare, 
176 


ENTER THE KNIGHT-MARE 


I’d be thankful, but a Knight-mare is an un- 
satisfactory sort of thing to be.” 

“A Knight-mare — Oh, how dreadful !” cried 
Ann, drawing away from him. “Is that 
what you are?” 

“There! You see how it is!” exclaimed the 
Knight-mare, tossing his long black mane. 
“Nobody’s got any sympathy for me. How 
would you like it? Suppose you were a little 
girl only as far as your shoulders and all the 
rest of you hippopotamus, eh?” 

“I wouldn’t like it at all,” said Ann, after 
thinking a moment. 

“Then no more do I,” said the Knight- 
mare, and sighed a long sad sigh. 

“Would you mind telling us how it hap- 
pened?” asked Rudolf politely. 

“Not at all,” said the Knight-mare. “You 
see I was a great boy for fighting in the old 
days — though you mightn’t think it to see me 
177 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

now — and I used to ride forth to battle on my 
coal-black steed, this very mare whose head 
I’m wearing now. Well, of course I was a 
terror to my enemies, used to scare ’em into 
fits, and I suppose it was one of those very fel- 
lows that got me into this fix, dreamed me into 
it one night, you know, only he got me and my 
steed mixed. We’ve stayed mixed ever since, 
and the worst of it is I oughtn’t to be a Bad 
Dream at all. I was the nicest kind of a Good 
Dream once — why I belonged to a lady who 
lived in a castle, and she thought a lot of me, 
she did!” 

“It’s too bad,” said Rudolf sympathet- 
ically; “but isn’t there anything you can do 
about it?” 

“Nothing,” groaned the Knight-mare, 
“nothing at all. At least not till I can find a 
way to get rid of this ugly head of mine. If 
there was anybody big enogh and brave 
178 


ENTER THE KNIGHT-MARE 


enough, now, to — ” He interrupted his speech 
to stoop down and snatch up something from 
the grass. It was Rudolf’s sword which he had 
dropped from his hand in his weariness after 
his battle with the Fidgets. “What’s this?” 
the Knight-mare cried. “Hurrah, a sword!” 

“My sword,” said Rudolf, stretching out 
his hand for it. 

“Just the thing for cutting heads off!” cried 
the Knight. “Will you lend it to me, like a 
good fellow? Mine is lost.” 

“What for?” asked Rudolf suspiciously. 

“Why, to cut my head off with, of course, 
or better yet, perhaps you’ll do it for me. 
Come, now! Just to oblige me?” 

Rudolf took back his sword, while Ann 
gave a little scream and seized both the 
Knight’s mailed hands in hers. “I’m sorry 
not to oblige you,” said Rudolf firmly, “but 
I can’t do anything of the sort. I never cut 
179 


THE WONDERFUL 1 BED 

anybody’s head off in my life, and the sword’s 
not so awful sharp, you know, and then how 
can you tell a new head will grow at your 
time of life?” 

“Oh, I’d risk that,” said the Knight-mare 
lightly. “I do wish you’d think it over. If 
you knew what a life mine is! All my days 
spent browsing round on shoots here in the 
wood, without a single adventure because no- 
body’s willing to be rescued by the likes of me ! 
And then the nights! Oh” — groaned the poor 
fellow — “the nights are the worst of all!” 

“What do you do then?” asked Rudolf and 
Ann. 

“Oh, I’m ridden to death,” sighed the 
Knight-mare. “As if it wasn’t bad enough to 
scare folks all day not meaning to, without be- 
ing sent out nights to do it on purpose!” He 
looked over his shoulder as if he was afraid 
some one might be listening, and then added 
180 


ENTER THE KNIGHT-MARE 


in a low voice, “And it’s not my fault, either, 
I swear it’s not. They actually make me 
do it!” 

The children shivered, for they guessed at 
once that “they” meant the Bad Dreams. Then 
they suddenly recollected poor little Peter, 
whom their last adventure and the Knight- 
mare’s talk had quite put out of their minds. 

“I tell you what,” said Rudolf suddenly, 
“I’ll make a bargain with you. My little 
brother has run away to find the Bad Dreams, 
and we have got to find him and bring him 
back. If you’ll lead us to him and help us all 
you can, why — why — I won’t promise — but 
I’ll see what I can do for you.” 

The Knight-mare gave a loud triumphant 
neigh. “Ods-bodikins and bran mash!” he 
cried. “You’re worth rescuing for nothing, 
the whole lot of you! But” — he added mourn- 
fully — “I ought to warn you to keep away 


THE WONDERFUL’ BED 


from that crowd — they’re a bad lot. You’d 
do better to cut along home.” 

“We can’t do that,” cried Rudolf and Ann 
together. 

“Then come with me,” said the Knight- 
mare. “It’s only a short way to — ” 

He was suddenly interrupted by a fresh 
commotion in the wood. Heavy bodies were 
parting the undergrowth back of where they 
stood. Before the children could think of es- 
cape, four strange figures sprang on them from 
behind, their arms were seized, they were 
tripped up, and they landed very hard upon 
the ground. Both knew in a moment what had 
happened. The Bad Dreams had caught 
them! 



CHAPTER XIII 


THE BAD DREAMS 

At first the children’s view was entirely 
shut off by the size and heaviness of the things 
that were sitting on their chests. They had 
been completely taken by surprise and they 
had not even breath enough left to cry out, 
but lay still and listened to what was going on 
about them. This is what they heard : 

“Ye arre arristid in the name of the Law!” 
a gruff voice was saying. “Move on, move 
on, move on.” 

“One moment, Officer,” a second voice in- 
terrupted. “Imprison these young persons, if 
you are so disposed, but pray allow me first 
my little opportunity to practise on them. 
This young lady — ahem! We will begin by 
183 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


extracting that large molar on the upper left- 
hand side, we will then have out two or 
three — ” 

“Ugh — ugh!” A series of hoarse grunts, 
and what had been sitting on Rudolf rose 
up and rushed at the last speaker. “No, no! 
Big Chief first! Big Chief Thunder-snore r 
take two fine scalp — ha! ha!” 

There was a confused sound of struggling 
and voices arguing, and in another moment 
Ann was relieved of her burden which, with 
a mighty moo, got up and joined the others. 
Ann sat up and clung to Rudolf, while the 
Knight-mare who was standing close beside 
her, laid a protecting hand upon her shoulder. 
When she saw what had been holding her 
down, she gave a little shriek. It was a small 
spotted cow in a red flannel petticoat. She 
wore stout button boots on her hind feet, and 
she now reared herself upon these to flourish 
184 


THE BAD DREAMS 


two angry hoofs over the sleek head of a little 
man in a white linen coat who held a tiny 
mirror in one hand and a pair of pincers in 
the other. Ann took a great dislike to this 
little man at once, and felt more afraid of him 
than of the Cow or of the handsome Indian 
Chief in full war-paint — feather head-dress 
and all — who was brandishing his tomahawk, 
sometimes in the face of the Little Dentist, 
again under the turned-up nose of a large fat 
Policeman who stood with folded arms, the 
only calm member of that much-excited 
group. 

The Knight-mare stepped forward and put 
himself between the children and the Bad 
Dreams. “Look here, you fellows,” he said 
quietly, “you may as well stop this nonsense 
first as last. You haven’t got any business here, 
and well you know it. If the Boss finds 
you’ve been disposing of any prisoners with- 

185 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


out his permission — well — you know what’ll 
happen!” 

That the Bad Dreams did know was to be 
seen by their foolish scared expressions. The 
Indian Chief, with a disappointed grunt, re- 
placed his tomahawk in his belt, and seated 
himself cross-legged on the grass, drawing his 
blanket closely about him. The Policeman 
stopped murmuring “Move on!” The Cow 
dropped clumsily on all fours and began to 
crop the bushes. Even the Little Dentist put 
his pincers back into his pocket, though he 
still looked wistfully at Ann, who avoided his 
eye as much as she could. This was a very 
terrifying company in which the children 
found themselves, and in spite of the comfort- 
ing presence of the friendly Knight-mare, 
they felt very doubtful of their present safety, 
not to speak of what might be done to them 
when once they were in the clutches of that 
1 86 


THE BAD DREAMS 


dreadful “Boss”, whom even the Bad Dreams 
seemed to be afraid of. 

“He has all the fun, anyway,” snorted the 
Cow, switching her tail. “All the choice bits 
of torturing. Why, I’ve not had so much as 
a single toss since I’ve been on this job; no I 
haven’t!” And she shook her sharp curved 
horns at Ann. 

“Not a tooth out yet!” complained the 
Dentist, “not a single one.” He sighed, glanc- 
ing from Ann to Rudolf and from Rudolf 
back again to Ann, as if he expected they 
might be coaxed into presenting him with a 
full set each. 

“ ’Tis himsilf does all the arristin’,” mut- 
tered the Policeman sadly. 

“Big-boss-chief take all good scalp,” 
Thunder-snorer, the Indian, grunted. 

The children began to think this “Boss” 
must indeed be a terror. 

187 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“Now, come, come,” continued the Knight- 
mare soothingly, “it’s not so bad as that. You 
all get plenty of fun, but you mustn’t mix it 
up with business. We’re in a row now, every 
one of us, for being out of bounds. Better 
move along and have it over, that’s my ad- 
vice.” 

The Policeman looked more cheerful. 
“That’s it,” cried he. “Move on!” 

Ann put her little arms around the Knight- 
mare’s neck and whispered something in his 
ear. He turned to the Cow and said: 

“Madam, this young lady wishes to know if 
anything has been seen or heard of another 
prisoner, a small fat one called Peter?” 

“Sir,” said the Cow, “he was taken just a 
little while ago. That’s why we four went off 
in a huff. We wanted a little fun with him, 
just a bit of our pretty play, you know, but the 
Boss wouldn’t have it. He’s saving him up 


THE BAD DREAMS 


for the Banquet, and not one of us is to be let 
at him till after that.” 

Rudolf and Ann looked at each other, 
both suddenly remembering the Sandman’s 
warning that on no account were any of them 
to taste the Bad Dreams’ food. Could Peter 
be expected to refuse any kind of refreshments 
at any time? They knew that he could not. 

“Come,” cried Rudolf, pulling at the 
Knight-mare’s arm. “Take us to him, please. 
We’ve got to hurry.” 

The Knight-mare obligingly stepped for- 
ward, leading Ann by the hand, and the Bad 
Dreams — to the children’s surprise — rose 
meekly to accompany them. It was decided 
that the Cow should go first, to clear a way 
through the forest by her simple method of 
trampling down everything before her. The 
Indian walked next, stepping softly and si- 
lently on his moccasined feet, and turning 
189 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

now and then to make a horrid face at the 
children who followed behind him, one on 
either side of the Knight-mare. The Dentist 
and Policeman, walking arm in arm, brought 
up the rear. The party had not gone a great 
distance through the wood, before Ann and 
Rudolf noticed that the underbrush was 
growing thinner and the trees beginning to be 
taller and farther apart. At last they could 
see through a veil of branches the light of a 
fire burning on the ground not a great distance 

i 

ahead of them, and soon they came close to 
the enormous oak tree under which this fire 
was kindled. Its flames were a strange bluish 
color, and as they shot up into the darkness 
which was almost complete under the shade 
of that great tree, the children could plainly 
see strange figures showing black against the 
light, leaping and dancing around the fire. 

190 


THE BAD DREAMS 


“The party’s begun, but not the Banquet,” 
whispered the Knight-mare. “You can come 
a little closer, but you mustn’t interrupt till 
it’s over.” 

► In silence they all moved a little nearer to 
the cleared space under the tree, but not so 
near as to be discovered. Rudolf and Ann 
gazed anxiously at the scene before them. 
First of all they noticed that the fire was not 
an ordinary fire, but a huge blazing plum 
pudding which accounted for the queer color 
of its flames. It was stuck full of bits of crack- 
ling holly and dripped sweet-smelling sauce 
in every direction. On the other side of the 
fire, just opposite to them, was a moss-grown 
log, and on this log sat Peter. His big brown 
eyes, shining with excitement, were fixed on 
the dancers passing before him, his little nose 
sniffed the burning plum pudding with great 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


satisfaction. As soon as her eye fell on her 
little brother, Ann started toward him, but 
the Knight-mare held her back. 

“No use,” said he. “Wait a bit, and I’ll 
tell you when the real trouble’s going to be- 
gin.” 

The children had no choice but to obey, and 
their attention was soon occupied by the 
strange sights before them. As one odd fig- 
ure after another sprang out of the dark into 
the firelight, capered and pranced, and then 
disappeared into the blackness again, Ann and 
Rudolf drew closer together and squeezed 
hands, very queer feelings creeping up and 
down their back-bones. The strangest part of 
it all was that among that crazy company 
were many whom the children did not see for 
the first time, who were old acquaintances of 
theirs! There — grinning and brandishing his 
stick — was the Little Black Man who had 
192 


THE BAD DREAMS 

worried Rudolf many a night as far back as he 
could remember. There was the Old Witch 
on the Broomstick, whom Ann had often de- 
scribed to him. There again, were other Bad 
Dreams that made the children almost smile 
as they remembered certain exciting times. 
The Angry Farmer — Rudolf had seen him 
before; he remembered his fierce expression, 
yes, and his short black whip, too! Also the 
Cross Cook, her fat arms rolled up in her 
apron, and “I’m going to tell your mother,” 
written plainly on her round red face. A 
great white Jam Pot danced just behind the 
Cook, and was followed by a dozen bright 
Green Apples. A Dancing-master came next, 
bowing and smiling at Peter as he passed him, 
then a Bear paddling clumsily along on its 
hind legs, its great red mouth wide open to 
show its long white teeth, then a Gooseberry 
Tart marked “Stolen”, then an Arithmetic 
193 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


with a mean sort of face, rulers for legs, and 
compasses for arms; then a Clock that had 
been meddled with by somebody (Rudolf 
felt certain it was not by him) and kept strik- 
ing all the time; then a Piano with a lot of 
horrid exercises waiting to be practised; then 
last of all a familiar clumsy figure with one 
red glaring eye — their old enemy, the Warm- 
ing-pan! 

As Rudolf was trying to take in these, and 
many others in that curious throng, he felt 
himself sharply pinched by Ann. “Look, 
look,” she whispered, “over there where it’s 
so dark, close to Peter. Oh, don’t you know 
now who their Boss is?” 

Rudolf looked. Clearly enough now he 
saw two flaming green eyes and a clumsy black 
figure crouching on the ground. Before this 
figure every one of the dancers made a low 
bow as he passed. 


194 


THE BAD DREAMS 


“Don’t you know him?” repeated Ann, 
shivering with excitement. “It’s Manunder- 
thebed!” 

“Oh, well, what if it is?” whispered Ru- 
dolf. “I stopped bothering about him years 
ago. He’s only for babies.” 

Ann was not deceived by Rudolf’s cheer- 
ful tone. Manunderthebed might not amount 
to much at home with nurse and mother to 
frighten him away, but here in his own coun- 
try it was not pleasant to meet him. 

“He’s horrid,” said she. “Oh, look, Ruddy, 
what is he doing now?” 

Manunderthebed had stretched out a long 
black arm and pointed to the fire. Instantly 
the Bad Dreams stopped their dance and van- 
ished into the darkness. When they came 
again into the firelight the children saw that 
the Cook, the Dancing-master, and several 
others carried large dishes in their hands 
195 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

which they now presented with low bows to 
Peter. 

“It’s the Banquet!” whispered the Knight- 
mare nervously. “If he touches a morsel, he’s 
lost. He’ll go to sleep and dream Bad Dreams 
forever and a day — which won’t be pleasant, 
I assure you.” 

Ann and Rudolf had not waited for the 
Knight-mare to finish his speech. They 
rushed on Peter, just as he had helped him- 
self to an enormous slice of mince pie, and 
while Ann threw her arms about his neck, 
Rudolf snatched the tempting morsel out of 
his hand and cast it in the fire. Of course 
Peter struggled and fussed and was not a bit 
grateful, but Rudolf and Ann did not care, 
for the Knight-mare’s warning rang in their 
ears. Meanwhile the Bad Dreams had gath- 
ered round the three children in an angry 
circle, and Manunderthebed growled out: 

196 


THE BAD DREAMS 


“Seize ’em, some of you! Where’s that fat 
Policeman?” 

“Here, sorr.” Very much against his will 
the Policeman had been pushed forward till 
he stood in front of the children, hanging his 
head and looking very uncomfortable. 

“Arrest ’em, why don’t you?” shouted the 
Boss. 

“Please, sorr, Oi have,” muttered the Po- 
liceman humbly, shifting from one foot to 
the other and looking more and more un- 
happy. 

“Then do it all over again, and be quick 
about it — or — ” Manunderthebed made a 
terrible face at the Policeman, who shivered, 
and edging up to Rudolf, laid a timid hand 
on his shoulder. 

“No you don’t!” cried Rudolf. “I’m not 
afraid of you!” And he gave the Policeman 
a poke with his sword, just a little one, about 
197 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


where his belt came. The Policeman gave a 
frightened yell, doubled up as if he had been 
shot, and ducking under the shoulders of the 
crowd made off into the darkness. Manunder- 
thebed was furious. The children heard him 
roar out a command, and then the Bad 
Dreams advanced on them in a body. The 
leaping dancing flames of the plum-pudding 
fire showed their angry faces and strange fig- 
ures. 

Rudolf was not really afraid now, for 
he saw at once that the Bad Dreams were not 
much at fighting, yet there were so many of 
them that by sheer force of their numbers they 
were slowly but surely pushing the three chil- 
dren back, back, until they were crowded 
against the trunk of the great oak tree where 
Manunderthebed had been crouching. He 
had run to fetch a great branch of burning 
holly from the fire, and holding this like a 


THE BAD DREAMS 


torch above his head, he pressed through the 
crowd toward Rudolf and dashed it almost 
into his eyes. Rudolf shrank back, half 
blinded by the glare, and bumped sharply 
into Peter, who in turn was pushed violently 
against Ann, who had set her back firmly 
against the tree trunk. The tree, as she de- 
scribed it afterward, seemed to give way be- 
hind her, and she fell backward into soft 
smothery darkness. Peter fell after her and 
Rudolf on top of Peter. The little door 
which had opened to receive them snapped to 
again, as if by magic, and from the other side 
of it the triumphant howls of the Bad Dreams 
came very faintly to their ears. 




CHAPTER XIV. 


IN THE HOLLOW TREE 

AT first it seemed perfectly dark inside the 
tree, but after the children had rubbed out of 
their eyes the soft powdery dust which their 
fall had stirred up, they made out the dull 
glow of a dying fire, a real one in a real fire- 
place this time, and no plum-pudding affair. 
From the amount of furniture they knocked 
against in moving about they knew they must 
be in somebody’s house. 

“Oh, dear,” whispered Ann, “I hope the 
owner is not at home!” 

Rudolf said nothing, for he was groping 
about after the poker. He found it presently 
and stirred the embers into quite a cheerful 
blaze. By this light the children were able to 


200 


IN THE HOLLOW TREE 


see dimly what the room was like. It was cir- 
cular in shape and the walls and ceiling were 
covered with rough bark. The floor was of 
earth, covered with a thick carpet of dry 
leaves. There were several chairs and a round 
table all made of boughs with the bark left on 
and the mantel-piece was built of curiously 
twisted branches. On it stood a round wooden 
clock and a pair of wooden candlesticks. A 
pair of spectacles lay on the top of a pile of 
large fat books upon the table. 

“I’d like to know whose house this is,” said 
Rudolf. 

“It’s Manunderthebed’s house,” said Peter 
calmly. 

“How do you know?” cried Ann and Ru- 
dolf. 

“ ’Cause I do know,” said Peter. 

. “Oh, Peter, you naughty boy, you are so 
provoking!” exclaimed Ann, hugging him. 


201 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“Tell sister what you mean, and what you’ve 
been doing and why you ran away to find those 
horrid creatures!” 

“Aren’t horrid,” said Peter, wriggling 
away from her, “and ’tis Manunderthebed’s 
house, ’cause he came out by the little door 
when the Bad Dreams brought me. He came 
out of his little door, and he said ‘Peter, will 
you come to my party?’ ” 

“But there isn’t any little door now,” inter- 
rupted Rudolf, “anyway, I can’t find it.” He 
had taken a candle from the mantel-piece, had 
lighted it at the fire, and was making a careful 
search of the walls. No trace of a door or any 
opening except the fireplace could be seen. 

“It’s a magic door,” said Peter cheerfully. 
“Manunderthebed touched something with 
his foot and that opened it and then he pushed 
you and you pushed me and I bumped into 
Ann, and here we are.” 


202 


IN THE HOLLOW TREE 


“He’s shut us up on purpose!” cried Ann. 
“It’s just like him.” 

“He’s shut us up to starve us into submis- 
sion, like they do in books,” said Rudolf 
gloomily. 

“I’m starved now,” began Peter, “and that 
was the very nicest pie!” But the other two 
were much provoked with Peter for having 
led them into such a fix, and they would not 
listen to him any longer. By Rudolf’s orders, 
Ann lighted the other candle and both 
searched again with the greatest care for some 
trace of the secret door. At last Ann’s sharp 
eyes spied not a door, but a small opening in 
the wall far above their heads, like a little 
round window not much bigger than a knot- 
hole. Rudolf climbed upon the table, but 
found he was hardly tall enough to look 
through, so he was obliged to hoist Peter upon 
his shoulders and let him have first look. 


203 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


When the little boy got his eye to the window 
he gave such a shout of surprise that he nearly 
knocked Rudolf and himself completely off 
the table. 

“Hush,” warned his brother, “you mustn’t 
make a noise! Can you see what the Bad 
Dreams are doing?” 

“Yes, I can see ’em,” whispered Peter. 

“They’re all sitting round the fire and Man- 
underthebed is making a speech.” 

“What’s he saying?” asked Ann anxiously. 

“I can’t hear, but he’s awful cross. Now the 
Little Black Man has gone — now he’s come 
back again, and — oh!” 

“What is it? What is it?” cried Ann and 
Rudolf. 

“He’s got three animals on a chain — a bear, 
an’ — an’ — a lion — an’ a great big white wolf!” 

“Oh, Peter, darling, you know they’re only 
dream animals!” Ann hastily reminded him. 


204 


IN THE HOLLOW TREE 


“Well, they’re most as nice as real ones, 
they’re awful fierce — ” 

“What’s the Little Black Man doing with 
’em?” interrupted Rudolf. 

“He’s letting them loose,” said Peter, “and 
they’re smelling round — ” 

“He’s putting them by the tree to guard us 
— that’s what he’s doing,” broke in Rudolf. 

“To swallow us up if we ever do escape!” 
wailed Ann, now thoroughly frightened. 
“Oh, Rudolf, whatever shall we do?” 

Rudolf hastily lowered Peter to the floor 
and got down off the table. “Ann,” said he, 
“there must be another way out. In books 
there always are two ways out of secret rooms, 
and this,” he added cheerfully, “is the book- 
iest thing that’s happened to us yet. Come, 
let’s look again for it.” 

He and Ann began the search once more, 
going over and over the walls by the light of 
205 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


their candles, but without any success. Peter 
was nosing about by himself in a little recess 
by the fireplace, and soon the other two heard 
him give a gleeful chuckle. 

“What is it? Have you found the spring of 
the secret door?” cried Rudolf, running to 
him. 

“Nope,” said Peter. “It’s nicer than that, 
it’s a cake. I found it right here on this little 
shelf that you went past and never noticed.” 

“Oh, Peter,” Ann scolded, “I think you are 
the very greediest little boy I ever knew!” 

“That cake belongs to Manunderthebed, 
and you know it,” said Rudolf sternly. “It’s 
a dream cake, of course, a Bad-dream cake, 
so you can’t eat it.” 

Peter clasped the small round cake tightly 
to his breast. 

“It’s a nice seed-cake like Cook makes,” he 
said stubbornly, “and I must eat it.” 

206 


IN THE HOLLOW TREE 


“The seeds in it are poppy-seeds,” ex- 
plained Rudolf, “and you’ll go to sleep and 
dream Bad Dreams forever, like the Knight- 
mare said, so you sha’n’t eat it!” He tried to 
get the cake away from his naughty little 
brother who only grasped it the more tightly. 
There would have been a quarrel, and a fierce 
one, if it had not been for Ann. 

“I tell you,” said she, “let’s try it on the ani- 
mals!” 

This seemed a really bright idea, and Ru- 
dolf agreed at once, though Peter considered 
it wasteful. Ann had to coax some time, but 
at last she persuaded him to part with his 
cake. Rudolf would not trust Peter with the 
distributing, so he piled three fat dictionaries 
that lay on the table one on top of another and 
climbed upon them himself, managing in this 
way to bring his eye to the level of the little 
window. The plum-pudding fire was burn- 
207 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


ing very low by this time, and Rudolf could 
barely make out the forms of some of the Bad 
Dreams who were stretched on the ground 
around it. 

Suddenly he gave a great start and nearly 
tumbled off the dictionaries, for he found 
himself staring down into the yellow hun- 
gry eyes of the big white wolf. Peter had 
described him truly, he was very fierce, 
wolfier-looking, Rudolf thought, than any of 
his kind the boy had seen in the dens at the 
park. Now the beast gave a low growl and 
opened his great red mouth. Rudolf dropped 
a generous bit of cake straight into it. The 
big jaws closed with a snap, and the white 
wolf looked up for more. By this time the 
other beasts had discovered the presence of 
refreshments, and came slinking forward, 
squatting themselves one on either side of 
their companion. 


208 


IN THE HOLLOW TREE 


Rudolf could hardly help a squeal of sur- 
prise at the sight of the yellow lion and the 
big shambling bear. He remembered in time, 
though, to smother it, and hastily divided the 
rest of the cake between the two animals. 
When they had licked it up greedily, Rudolf 
turned his attention again to the white wolf, 
and this time he could not suppress an excla- 
mation of delight. 

“Oh, what is it, tell us,” cried Ann, while 
Peter jumped up and down impatiently, beg- 
ging to be allowed to see. 

“He’s going to sleep — the white wolf is,” 
whispered Rudolf. “He’s rocking from side 
to side — he can hardly stand up — his red 
tongue is hanging out of his mouth — he looks 
too silly for anything — now he’s rolled over 
on his back — now he’s snoring!” 

“And the other animals — the lion and the 
bear?” 


209 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


“They are lying down, too, they will be 
asleep in a moment! There, Peter, didn’t I 
tell you it was a dream cake?” 

But even then Peter did not appear grate- 
ful. He went back to the shelf where he had 
found the cake and stood looking at it wist- 
fully, as if he hoped he would find another. 
Rudolf came up behind him and looked over 
his shoulder. 

“It’s no use,” said Peter mournfully, “there 
isn’t any more.” 

“There’s this!” cried Rudolf triumphantly, 
and reaching over Peter he pressed a little 
round knob of wood half hidden under 
the shelf. Instantly the whole shelf, together 
with a large piece of the wall, swung aside, 
and the children were standing on the thresh- 
old of just such another little door as that by 
which they had entered, only on the other side 
of the tree. For a moment the three children 


210 


IN THE HOLLOW TREE 


hesitated, half afraid to believe in their good 
luck, and then, taking hold of hands they 
stepped softly out of their prison. Almost at 
their feet lay the great white wolf, the yellow 
lion, and the shaggy bear, all snoring in con- 
cert. Carefully avoiding them, the children 
made for the thick woods ahead, not caring 
where they went so long as they could 
escape from their enemies. The big tree was 
now between them and the plum-pudding fire 
around which the Bad Dreams lay asleep, so 
it really seemed as if they had a good chance 
of getting away unseen. 

“Hurry, hurry,” Rudolf whispered, drag- 
ging Ann by the hand. “If we can only get to 
those thick trees I am sure we shall be safe.” 

“If they only don’t wake up!” she panted. 

Just at that exciting moment Peter had to 
make trouble — as usual. He stumbled and fell 
over a twisted root, hurt his knee, and gave a 
21 1 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


loud angry squeal. Rudolf clapped a hand 
over his mouth and dragged him to his feet, 
but it was too late — they were discovered. A 
tall form shot up out of the grass just behind 
them, and instantly a loud war-whoop rang 
through the woods. 

“It’s Thunder-snorer — it’s the Indian,” Ru- 
dolf cried. “Run for your lives !” 



CHAPTER XVi 
COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF 

The Bad Dreams were all aroused by 
Thunder-snorer’s war-whoop, and in an in- 
stant the whole pack of them, headed by Man- 
underthebed, were at the children’s heels. 
Rudolf and Ann ran as fast as ever they 
could, dragging Peter after them, but it was 
both difficult and dangerous to run fast 
through that dark wood, especially as they 
had no idea in what direction they ought to 
go. Each moment they expected to be over- 
taken, each moment they seemed to feel Man- 
underthebed’s long black arm stretched out to 
drag them back to their prison — or to some- 
thing worse. 

Then suddenly from just ahead of them 


213 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

came the sound of a great crashing and rus- 
tling among the bushes and the tramp of ap- 
proaching feet. Some new danger — perhaps 
something worse than what was behind them 
— seemed to threaten the children, but they 
were too breathless, too bewildered even to try 
to avoid it. On they ran — straight into the 
arms of a tall figure who was hurrying to meet 
them, a knight dressed in shining armor wear- 
ing a plumed helmet on his handsome head. 
At the same moment a troop of little tin sol- 
diers broke through the bushes and rushed 
past the children to attack the Bad Dreams. 
All of them were quickly put to flight except 
their leader, Manunderthebed, who at first 
sight of the soldiers had hidden himself be- 
hind a tree. As soon as they had passed he 
crept forth and made a dart at the children. 
But they had a protector now! The tall 
knight stepped in front of them and raised his 
214 


COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF 


glittering sword. Before he could bring it 
down, the cowardly King of the Bad Dreams 
gave a horrible yell and turned to run. He 
might have escaped, but as he passed Rudolf 
the boy put out his foot and tripped him up. 
There the rascal lay on his back, kicking 
wildly, while the Knight stood guard over 
him. Seen close by, Manunderthebed was not 
quite so dreadful as when he crouched in his 
dark haunt near the hollow tree, but still his 
shaggy fur, sharp white teeth, and gleaming 
green eyes were very terrifying to Ann, who 
gave a little shriek and turned her face away. 

“Don’t be afraid,” cried the Knight. “This 
is the end of Manunderthebed!” And he 
stooped and caught hold of the shaggy fellow 
by the shoulder. A crack, a rip, and the whole 
silly disguise came away in one piece, fur suit, 
teeth, claws, and green glass eyes. The ter- 
rible King of the Bad Dreams was just a big 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


naughty boy in knickerbockers who kicked 
and cried and begged to be let go! The chil- 
dren had to laugh, they could not help it, to 
hear him blubber and whine and promise over 
and over again that he’d never, no, never 
frighten little girls and boys any more! So 
at last the Knight let him scramble to his feet 
and rush off through the woods as fast as he 
could go. 

“That’s the last of him” said the children’s 
protector smiling, “but now tell me, you three, 
what do you think of the change in my appear- 
ance?” 

For a moment the three children stared up 
at the tall figure, admiring yet puzzled, then 
Ann clapped her hands and shouted: “Oh, I 
know now who you are — you’re the Knight- 
mare !” 

The tall figure swept off his helmet and 
made Ann such a low bow that his fair curl- 
216 


COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF 


ing locks brushed the ground, fluttering like 
yellow plumes about his ruddy face. “I’m all 
knight now,” cried he, “and none of me mare. 
I’m a Good Dream now, and I’ve no doubt 
she’ll be rather pleased to get me back — the 
lady I belong to in the castle, you know. I’m 
wearing her glove, as you may perceive.” 

“But how did it happen?” asked Ann, fin- 
gering the helmet with the greatest admira- 
tion. 

“Well,” said the Knight, “as soon as you 
children were imprisoned in the hollow tree 
I managed to escape from those fellows and 
rushed off to Sandy to get you help. I found 
he had already sent to the Corn-cob Queen for 
rescuers and just as we were talking they ar- 
rived. I agreed to guide their leader through 
the woods to Manunderthebed’s place if he 
would first settle a certain little matter for me 
— that one your brother wasn’t very anxious 
217 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


to tackle, you know. Well, when I asked him 
if he’d cut off my head, he said he’d just as 
lief as not!” 

All three children burst out laughing. 

“There’s only one person we’ve met as fierce 
as that,” said Ann, “and that’s Captain Jinks.” 

“Captain Jinks — at your service,” snapped 
a sharp voice at her elbow, and turning, Ann 
found the little tin captain standing beside 
her. “I have to report,” said he, wheeling 
around to Rudolf and saluting him stiffly — 
“the enemy — routed completely!” 

Never, never had the children expected to 
be so glad to meet the little captain again! 
They thanked him heartily for his part in 
their splendid rescue, and asked him what he 
thought it was best to do next. 

“Sound a recall,” answered the officer, “and 
return in good order according to commands.” 

“Whose commands, Captain Jinks?” Ru- 
218 


COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF 


dolf wanted to know, but Jinks would not 
answer any more questions just then. He re- 
called those of his fierce little soldiers who, 
with the sergeant at their head, were still chas- 
ing the last remnants of the Bad Dreams back 
to the depths of the wood, formed them into 
marching order, and taking the head of the 
procession himself, placed the children di- 
rectly behind him under the protection of 
the Knight. They were anxious to have the 
little captain explain all the particulars of 
their rescue, but found it very hard indeed to 
make him talk while on duty. He marched so 
fast that they had to trot to keep up with him, 
and stared straight ahead without winking an 
eye. “Queen’s orders,” was all they could at 
first get out of him. 

“But, Jinks, dear, who was it brought the 
message to the Queen?” Ann coaxed. 

“Traveling Gentleman!” The little cap- 


219 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


tain made a disgusted face. “He’s a nice one! 
Said nobody was being shut up nowhere, nor 
didn’t want to be rescued.” 

For a moment the children were puzzled, 
then Rudolf called out, “Oh, I know — the 
False Hare!” 

They all laughed and Ann said: “I sup- 
pose Sandy didn’t know any better than to 
send him, but I should think he’d make a 
pretty funny messenger!” 

“Make a better pie,” said Jinks grimly, and 
not another word could they get out of him 
after that. They were now coming to that part 
of the wood Ann and Rudolf remembered 
so well, where the kindly Knight had rescued 
them from the attack of the tiresome Fidgets. 
They looked about for signs of the little crea- 
tures’ presence in the branches overhead, and 
listened for their chattering laughter, but the 
coming of so large a company must have 


220 


COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF 


0 


scared the cowardly Fidgets away, for not a 
trace of them was to be seen. 

At last the procession struck the little path 
Sandy had pointed out to the children, and in 
another moment it was being met and greeted 
by a whole troop of Good Dreams who had 
rushed to welcome the returning party and 
escort them back to the glade. Here they 
found the whole family assembled: the Cook- 
that-liked-living-in-the-Country, the Gar- 
dener- with - the - Generous - Disposition, the 
Pink Stockings, the Nice Nurse, the Good 
Baby, the Easter Rabbit, the Birthday Cake, 
the Organ Man, the Tall Candlesticks, and the 
Jolly Santa Claus — one and all of the Good 
Dreams, with Noddy and Blink, the two fat 
boys, and — best of all — old Sandy himself, a 
twinkle in his sleepy eyes, a grin on his round 
good-humored face. 

“Well, well, well,” cried he. “Glad to see 


221 


THE WONDERFUL BED 

you back again, my friends! Guess you’ve had 
enough of the bad ’uns — eh, young man?” 
And he gave Peter a kindly dig in the ribs. 
Peter grinned and looked rather foolish but 
said nothing. “And now,” went on Sandy, 
pushing aside the excited dreams that 
crowded round him, “make way, all of you! 
Let these young people see who’s come to wel- 
come them.” He led the children across the 
glade to where, throned on a pile of sacks, 
sat the Corn-cob Queen! There she was in 
her greeny-yellowy gown, her little head 
erect, her sweet face smiling, her tiny hands 
stretched out to greet the children. They 
could have hugged her, but they didn’t dare, 
she looked, in spite of being just a doll and 
an old-fashioned one at that, so truly like a 
Queen. Back of her majesty stood a group of 
doll ladies-in-waiting dressed in their gayest 
clothes, and among them were Ann’s very 


222 


COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF 


own children, Marie-Louise and Angelina- 
Elfrida! They did not look haughty or 
naughty or cross any more, but smiled sweetly 
at their little mother. 

“Yes,” said the Queen, “I have come to wel- 
come you back, dears, and to say good-by, for 
I suppose you would like to go home to your 
Aunt Jane now, wouldn’t you?” 

“Oh, yes, indeed, please your Majesty,” 
cried Rudolf and Ann in one breath — but 
Peter said nothing. He was gazing rather re- 
gretfully at the False Hare who lounged 
near by, smoking his chocolate cigarette and 
polishing the nap of his silk hat with the back 
of his paw. The False Hare winked at Peter 
and edged a little closer to him. “Mighty 
glad to see the last of you, old chap,” he whis- 
pered. Then Peter smiled all over, he was so 
pleased. 

“Yes, I suppose it’s time for you to be go- 
223 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


ing, if go you really must,” sighed Sandy. 
“And since you’re in such a hurry, I’m happy 
to be able to include you in that consignment 
of your aunt’s after all. She” — and he bowed 
gallantly to the Queen — “says it’s all right, 
and what she says goes, though to be sure, it’s 
out of order, slightly out of order!” As he 
spoke he took his list out of his pocket and ran 
his eye over it once more. “Hullo,” said he in 
a surprised tone, “there’s one more item on 
Miss Jane Mackenzie’s and it seems to be 
missing! Comparatively unimportant, but I 
like to have my things complete. ‘One lost 
Kitten!’ Now what can have become of that, 
I wonder?” 

It was Captain Jinks’ voice that broke the 
silence. “Prisoner of War, sir! Taken with 
others by the Commander-in-Chief in the re- 
cent glorious victory of the tin soldiers over 
the cat pirates. Here you are, sir!” He mo- 
224 



“Now then, all ready?” 







COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF 

tioned to two of the soldiers who stood on 
guard over something in a dim corner of the 
glade. The soldiers hustled the object for- 
ward. It was Captain Mittens! Mittens de- 
spoiled of his scarlet sash, his turban, his 
sword and pistols, even of his fierce expres- 
sion! Mittens, no longer a bold and bloody 
robber of the seas but a humble repentant kit- 
ten who let himself be cuddled into Peter’s 
arms without so much as a single scratch. 

Peter stroked the pirate — and the pirate 
purred! 

“Now then, all ready? All aboard!” It was 
Sandy’s voice who spoke and Sandy’s were the 
arms that lifted the children gently into the 
enormous sack held open by Noddy and Blink, 
and placed them at the top of the toboggan- 
slide — but they were feeling too curiously 
tired and sleepy to understand exactly what 
was happening. Rudolf, still clasping his 
225 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


tin sword — that invaluable weapon — pillowed 
his sleepy head on the shoulder of the Gener- 
ous Gardener. Ann rested comfortably on the 
large lap of the Cook-who-liked-living-in-the- 
Country, and Peter snuggled close beside her, 
holding Mittens tightly in his arms. 

They thought the new non-fadable curtains 
were packed in somewhere, they thought they 
saw the kindly face of old Sandy peeping into 
the mouth of the sack at them while the whole 
troop of Good Dreams pushed and crowded 
one another to peer at them over his shoulder. 
Among all the familiar faces were some they 
had almost forgotten but were not sorry to see 
again: the Lady Goose, waving her spoon; 
the Gentleman Goose, and Squealer and 
Squawker, his two little duck apprentices; the 
cheerful grinning countenances of Prowler and 
Growler, the mates, with Toddles and Towser 
226 


COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF 


the common sea-cats. But at the last all grew 
dim, faded, melted into mist until two figures 
only stood out clearly and distinctly. One was 
the Corn-cob Queen smiling and waving her 
tiny hand in loving farewell, the other that of a 
little boy in long trousers and a frill collar, a 
merry-faced boy with a toy sword buckled 
round his waist and a toy ship in his hand. 
Though they had not seen him until now, the 
children recognized him at once. It was the 
little boy Aunt Jane had told them of — the 
Little Boy who Went Away to Sea. It was 
also the Commander-in-Chief of the tin sol- 
diers, whom the Queen had said they might be 
allowed to see, if they were good. 

Just then the children began to feel it im- 
possible to keep their eyes open any longer. 
They heard the voices of all their friends call- 
ing “Good-by”, but they could not answer. 

227 


THE WONDERFUL BED 


They tried to get one more glimpse of the 
Good Dreams, but their eyes dropped shut — 
they were far away. 

In the morning Aunt Jane woke to find all 
three children in her room. Ann jumped into 
bed on one side of her, Peter, holding Mit- 
tens, snuggled himself on the other, and Ru- 
dolf bestrode the foot. 

“Why, good morning, dears,” she said. 
“Did you sleep well in the big bed?” 

The children looked at one another thought- 
fully. 

“Did you have good dreams?” asked Aunt 
Jane politely. “I did, I dreamt about you 
three all night.” 

“We had funny dreams,” said Rudolf, “at 
least, I suppose they were — ” He stopped, 
looking very puzzled. 

“We woke up laughing,” Ann said, “and 
228 


COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF 


we got right out of bed to come quickly to tell 
you something awful funny that happened to 
us, but now — ” 

“Now we’ve forgotten it!” finished Ru- 
dolf sadly. 

Peter said nothing at all. He looked very 
grave and thoughtful and squeezed Mittens 
just a little — only a little too hard. The kit- 
ten gave a slight squeak. 

“Will you be good now?” whispered Peter 
in his furry ear. “Will you never run away 
no more — never?” 

But Mittens would not answer. 


rag 



'm 


EP 18 


O ETE3 

o 


19 


in 
3 4 

































f 








* 
















* 







































































. 

• • 








► * 








. * 




































' 























































































* 








